Welcome to my life

Read the title

2007-01-27T11:59:00.001Z

WHEN LIFE HURTS
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for You are with me. - Psalm 23:4

I counseled with a man a few months back. He had just lost his wife of many years in a tragic accident. Although he was a committed Christian, he was still devastated, bewildered, angry, and, deep down, did not want to go on. It was hard seeing him so hurt, yet there was nothing anyone could do for him to take away the pain.
While not all of us experience the same tragedies in life, we can all relate to being hurt. We can all relate to rejection, abuse, ridicule, disappointment, betrayal, loss, fear, sadness, bad choices… and the list goes on.

NO ONE IS IMMUNE

King David was the only man in the Bible called “a man after God’s own heart” (Acts 13:22), yet he suffered hurt on many levels – misunderstood and hunted by King Saul, mocked and despised by his own wife, betrayed and hated by his own son, devastated by his own sin, and rejected by the people who chose to follow Absalom instead of David. Without question, David spent lots of time in the dark valley of the shadow of death.
But notice… he walked through that valley; he did not build a home there. He did not curse God and die there. He trusted God in the valley… and the Lord saw him through to the other side.
WHY?

Why the dark valleys? Why all the hurts? Why all the storms in life? To show us that God is more than able to take the worst life can throw at us and turn it around for good.
Adrian Rogers used to say, “A faith that cannot be tested, cannot be trusted.” Our faith is not tested on the mountain top… it is tested in the valley. People watch you in the valley to see if your Jesus really does make a difference.
You and I will NEVER have a better opportunity to show the manifest presence of Jesus Christ to a lost and dying world than when we are hurting. If they can see a peace that passes understanding… a confidence that defies the circumstances… a joy that does not make sense… then they will begin to see Jesus in you and me and want what we have.

WHAT TO DO?

No matter how you may be hurting today, do not give up!! Do not give into the temptation to “curse God and die!” Even though you may not feel it or understand it, the Lord really does love you, and He still has a wonderful plan. Nothing can come into your life unless it first filters through His fingers of love.
Thank Him for the hurt. That’s right, thank Him for the hurt. Give it all to Him so He can use it for good. Remember, He promises to never leave you or forsake you (Heb. 13:5). He promises to give you “beauty for ashes” (Is. 61:3). Seek Him each day for strength to go on. Remind Him that He promised to be present in your valley. Ask Him to see you through!! He will do it, if you do not quit!

A HAPPY ENDING

My friend who came to me those many months ago with a load of hurt, he came back to see me just the other day, asking me to marry him and his fiancée. God has brought a beautiful, godly lady into his life. She also lost her spouse suddenly and unexpectedly a few years ago. Both of them refused to live in the valley. They sought God through the hurts and the tears and the lonely, dark nights… and God has brought them through.
He will do the same for you, my friend. He is a God who brings us through! It will not be immediate, for it takes time to heal… but it will be sure as you simply depend upon Him and say with Job, “Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him” (Job 13:15).
There is a light and a new life at the end of your dark valley! How do I know? Because He promised!!

God Is Your Rewarder

2006-12-28T06:29:00.000Z

Hebrews 11:6

6But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

Hebrews 11:6 does not end with “without faith it is impossible to please Him”. It continues with the line, “for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him”. In other words, the faith that pleases God is the kind of faith that believes that God exists and that He is a rewarder.

The Bible also says that “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”. (Hebrews 11:1) Even in times of difficulty, when we do not see good things happening in our circumstances, we are to believe that God will turn things around and reward us.

God turned things around for Ruth, the Moabite widow, when she believed the Lord and made Him her God. (Ruth 1:16) The Bible tells us that Ruth was given a “full reward” by the Lord when she came under His wings for refuge. (Ruth 2:12) Not only did God give her protection, He also gave her abundant provision, exceeding favour and a glorious redemption. (Ruth 2:9–17, 3:11, 4:10–13)

When Rahab, the harlot of Jericho, heard reports of how God had opened up the Red Sea for the children of Israel, she believed that “He is God in heaven above and on earth beneath”. (Joshua 2:9–11) Though Rahab had not personally witnessed the miracles, she believed God and hid the spies from their pursuers. (Joshua 2:4–6) Because of her faith, she not only did not perish with those who did not believe (Joshua 6:25, Hebrews 11:31), but was also given a place in the “Hall of Faith” in Hebrews 11.

God was so pleased with the faith of these two Gentile women that He not only blessed them in their lifetimes, but He also put both of them into the genealogy of His Son, Jesus Christ, the great Redeemer and rewarder.

Beloved, when you come to the Lord with your needs, believe that He is God, and that He is a rewarder. God has pleasure in this kind of faith. He wants to be the rewarder of your faith in Him!

Are you offering a job ?

2006-11-05T20:57:00.000Z

The Resume of Jesus Christ

Address: Ephesians 1:20
Phone: Romans 10:13
Website: The Bible
Keywords: Jesus Christ, Lord & Savior

My name is Jesus - The Christ. Many call me Lord! I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart. Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.

Qualifications:

• I founded the earth and established the heavens (see Proverbs 3:19).
• I formed man from the dust of the ground (see Genesis 2:7).
• I breathed into man the breath of life (see Genesis 2:7).
• I redeemed man from the curse of the law (see Galatians 3:13).
• The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me (see Galatians 3:14).

Occupational Background:

• I've only had one employer (see Luke 2:49).
• I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.
• My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me (see Matthew 3:15-17).

Skills & Work Experiences:

• Some of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised (see Luke 4:18).
• I am a Wonderful Counselor (see Isaiah 9:6). People who Listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil (see Proverbs 1:33).
• Most importantly, I have the authority, ability & power to cleanse you of your sins (see I John 1:7-9)

Educational Background:

• I encompass the entire breadth & length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding (see Proverbs 2:6).
• In me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge (see Colossians 2:3).
• My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a lamp unto your path (see Psalms 119:105).
• I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart (see Psalms 44:21).

Major Accomplishments:

• I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times (see Genesis 1:26).
• I laid down my life so that you may live (see II Corinthians 5:15).
• I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind & made a show of them openly (see Colossians 2:15).
• I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead!
• There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.

References:

• Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healings, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidance.

In Summation:

Now that you've read my resume, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths (see Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life (see John 6:47). When can I start? Time is of the essence (see Hebrews 3:15).

Men Whom Men Condemn as I'll

2006-11-01T00:33:00.000Z

In men whom men condemn as ill
I find so much of goodness still,
In men whom men pronounce divine
I find so much of sin and blot,
I do not dare to draw a line
Between the two, where God has not.

2006-10-31T17:30:00.000Z

i should draw a line. and now it is crossed. i should listen to people's advice. let it not be too late please. im prepared to let go.

A story like mine has never been told.

2006-10-31T17:08:00.000Z

summary

2006-10-28T02:06:00.000+01:00

shortnote: the whole bible can be summarize as such "to know christ and to made him known"

sucky day indeed.

2006-10-23T03:13:00.000+01:00

my heart broke into pieces. today, i lost my job. broke people's window, got gang-raped by dogs. cut my finger both left and right. tired, jobless & still in the midst of looking for one. like one of those days where everything goes bad. worst thing is i broke someone's heart. sien

The Spirit and your Flesh.

2006-10-10T18:21:00.000+01:00

Discernment time! When you are in the flesh, the nature of sin will manifest in your life. all self desires will be made conscience in your life. one can not say "i am living in the Spirit" and still have the conscience or desire to sin (Heb 10:2). for the flesh desires to please itself therefore anything that is to do with "denying himself" is of the Spirit. Mat 16:24 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man would come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. if you carry your cross and follow Jesus, the flesh will come against you and satan will oppose you, he will offer you what he offered Jesus "If you are the Son of God, bring yourself down from the cross" he will offer you fame and dominion like what he did when Jesus was tempted. all he does is to take your life off the cross But do not be afraid, for if you crucify yourself with Christ, in other words if you bring yourself to the cross death will lose its power over you.

For where the cross is demons flee, bondage is broken, love is showered upon you, Life will come after you and resurrection awaits thee. it does no requires ANY self effort but only the Grace of God. That is the reason why the psalmist in 118:26 "Tie the sacrifice with cords to the horns of the altar. in other words, let your flesh be crucified on the cross. Gal 5:24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts." Gal 5:25 "If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit." my friend it is impossible to walk in the Spirit if your flesh is alive. no, not untill you crucify your flesh. When the flesh begins to die, faith comes alive. i think this may answer the question why people who seem to have the faith in the world receive nothing from God because that faith is produced by the flesh and the flesh cannot produce living faith.

people keep on saying "i believe, i believe, i did believe" so does the devil. my friend if that "faith" is only in your head its because your dead to the things of the Spirit. the moment self surrender, the moment the old man is gone real faith comes alive. faith that is born of the Spirit does not have to convience itself to believe. thats why when there is a result in healing people ask me "how? or why?" and i said its because your flesh is still alive or your prayer is of the flesh and not of the Spirit. it is unjust for God not to heal someone when He already testify of the truth "He was wounded for our transgression bruise for our iniquity and by His stripes we are healed". If a person is healed, praise God but if his not? we question "why?" or we give all sort of reasons born of the carnal mind like "sometimes God don't heal" do not let people rob you of this truth. dont let the goat steal your food. our faith is to believe all the time, hope all the time and love all the time that is our calling! hehe i dont know where am i going but remember this! "you shall worship the Lord your God in Spirit and in Truth"
end of story ;P

God is a matchmaker

2006-10-05T15:07:00.000+01:00

i am currently reading "God is a MatchMaker" with the motto " do you want a marriage that is made in heaven ? " a friend of mine echo with the statement " everyone wants a marriage made in heaven " so i was thinking WHY in some relationship there is NO ongoing result? and the Spirit told me, Do you know your life being a christian brings you to the result of finding your mate? of course i said!! but the Spirit add on "So is everyone living the narrow way God has appointed for Mankind to have a successful marriage ?" err NO? than the WAY of you living a perfect christian life is no difference than the WAY you find your life partner. Derek Prince quoted from 2 Corth 6:14-15

"Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common ? or what fellowship can light have with darkness? what harmony is there between Christ and Belial? what does a believer have in common with unbeliever ?"

Paul is not telling us to be cold toward our non-christian neighbors, he is simply warning us that we cannot afford to establish with unbelievers the close relationships that are appropriate with believers. obviously he has in mind various kinds of relationships. But the first word he uses yoke is used reguarly for the marriage relationship. Paul is warning it is always wrong for a christian to marry a non-christian. You are not free to marry a non-Christian nor entertain the thought. The marriage with an unbeliever is outside of God's plan for your life. The best protection againsst wrong relationships is right relationships. Be diligent, then to cultivate fellowship and friendhsip with fellow believers. In most cases, marriage develops out of existing relationship. if you have built strong relationships with other christians, you are not likely even to contemplate marriage with a non-christian. Your safest course is to decide right NOW about the kinds of relationship you are going to cultivate.

lover of my soul~

2006-10-03T04:06:00.000+01:00

Our precious Lord was crucified
That gray and stormy day
They hung Him high upon a cross
His prayer they heard Him say.

"Forgive them Father for they know not
What they do to me"
The blood flowed down His precious face
For everyone to see.

Jesus, God's one and only son
Who gave His life for me
He is unique, one of a kind
My Savior He'll always be.

The horror of that fateful day
So many years ago
When they crucified my Jesus
As all God's children know.

Nailed our Lord on a cross
A spear pierced deep in his side
Bolts driven in His feet and hands
As his Mother knelt and cried.

A crown of thorns on His head
Blood covered His precious brow
He cried to Heaven as thunder roared
"Father why forsake me now?"

He gave His life for you and me
The least that we can do
Is live our life for Jesus
Let Him know we love him too

Someday He will come for us
Repent and show you care
Be ready when He comes my friend
His Heavenly home you'll share.

just saying things out.

2006-09-23T03:13:00.000+01:00

CF's program is abit unique today. unplanned, Indecisive and it was really funny. Eugene, I and God did the ministering today, and from my impression it was not good im not satisfied!! well eugene was incharge of worship and i did the prayer session, think he did great but my prayer session was awful i think? dont get me wrong this is not being humble ok its just taadaaa ~ failing to plan is planning to fail (proverbs) the whole night i had the impression of everyone was doing fine except for me.. and then the thought of your-not-a-good-minister came up together with you-can-not-be-a-preacher came crashing on me. But somehow, deep down inside me, there is something lifting me up..i know Who it was and while i was walking out of hall, i had a pat on my shoulder with the most encouraging words i need to hear "chris, well done, we really need that sharing" then i said to God, "i really need that" and i gave the biggest smile God ever seen. What an amazing God we serve ;)

read this :)

2006-09-17T19:37:00.000+01:00

This is a very good article. read it.
Those who are still single may learn something from here....
Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your
marriage....

DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question.
She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?"
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said,
"It depends. Is that your husband?"
In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are
good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with
your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked
their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a
completely natural and spontaneous experience.
You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...

Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the
imagery of that _expression. It implies that you were just standing
there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling is love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.
But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the
natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls
become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when
it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive

you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you
think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between
the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry
subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry
the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of
the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with
someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their
spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for
fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is
the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby, a
friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage.
It lies within it.
I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a
few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S
LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER
just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it
day in and day out. That's why we have the _expression "the labor of love."

Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it
takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific
things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your
marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there
are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise
program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your
relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and
effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...you
can "make" love.

Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling.

Those who has ear let him hear. it's from my heart.

2006-09-13T18:22:00.000+01:00

The greatest gift of all, Salvation

The central theme of the Bible is God's love for you and for all people. This love was revealed when Jesus Christ, the Son of God, came into the world as a human being, lived a sinless life, died on the cross, and rose from the dead. Because Christ died, your sins can be forgiven, and because He conquered death you can have eternal life. You can know for sure what will become of you after you die.

You have probably heard the story of God’s love referred to as the "Gospel." The word Gospel simply means "Good News." The Gospel is the Good News that, because of what Christ has done, we can be forgiven and can live forever.

But this gift of forgiveness and eternal life cannot be yours unless you willingly accept it. God requires an individual response from you. The following verses from the Bible show God's part and yours in this process:

God's love is revealed in the Bible
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16).

God loves you. He wants to bless your life and make it full and complete. And He wants to give you a life, which will last forever, even after you experience physical death.

We are sinful
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23).
You may have heard someone say, "I'm only human--nobody's perfect." This Bible verse says the same thing: We are all sinners. We all do things that we know are wrong. And that's why we feel estranged from God--because God is holy and good, and we are not.

Sin has a penalty
"For the wages of sin is death" (Romans 6:23).

Just as criminals must pay the penalty for their crimes, sinners must pay the penalty for their sins. If you continue to sin, you will pay the penalty of spiritual death: You will not only die physically; you will also be separated from our holy God for all eternity. The Bible teaches that those who choose to remain separated from God will spend eternity in a place called hell.

Christ has paid our penalty!
"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8).

The Bible teaches that Jesus Christ, the sinless Son of God, has paid the penalty for all your sins. You may think you have to lead a good life and do good deeds before God will love you. But the Bible says that Christ loved you enough to die for you, even when you were rebelling against Him.

Salvation is a free gift
"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God--not by works, so that no one can boast" (Ephesians 2:8-9).

The word grace means "undeserved favour." It means God is offering you something you could never provide for yourself: forgiveness of sins and eternal life, God's gift to you is free. You do not have to work for a gift. All you have to do is joyfully receive it, Believe with all your heart that Jesus Christ died for you!

Christ is at your heart's door
"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me" (Revelation 3:20).

Jesus Christ wants to have a personal relationship with you. Picture, if you will, Jesus Christ standing at the door of your heart (the door of your emotions, intellect and will). Invite Him in; He is waiting for you to receive Him into your heart and life.

You must receive Him
"Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God" (John 1:12).

When you receive Christ into your heart you become a child of God, and have the privilege of talking to Him in prayer at any time about anything. The Christian life is a personal relationship to God through Jesus Christ. And best of all, it is a relationship that will last for all eternity.

How to Pray:

Dear Lord Jesus,

I know that I am a sinner and need Your forgiveness. I believe that You died for my sins. I want to turn from my sins. I now invite You to come into my heart and life. I want to trust and follow You as Lord and Saviour.

In Jesus' name. Amen.

The Bible says...

"Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved." Romans 10:13

The love of God

2006-09-10T23:47:00.000+01:00

Studies have shown that in the heart of every child is a cry for his father’s approval. Something happens when a father says to his boy, “Daddy is so proud of you.” Or when a father says to his girl, “You will always be Daddy’s favourite girl.”

You can catch such a similar special moment when God the Father displayed His approval of His Son — “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17) The Bible shows us that Jesus’ ministry began with the approval of the Father, even before He had performed any miracle.

Now, you may think that God would naturally say that of Jesus, but not of us. My friend, the truth is, Jesus came for us and as us. Jesus died for us and as us. Jesus received the approval of the Father for us and as us. He came as our representative. And if that is not enough, God tells us in His Word that we are “accepted in the Beloved” !

Why did God specifically say “accepted in the Beloved” and not simply “accepted in Christ”? I believe that it is because He is calling to our remembrance what had happened at the Jordan river where He said, “This is My Beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased”. (Matthew 3:17) God wants us to know that we are His beloved and that He is well pleased with us.

God sees us as His beloved because He has made us accepted in the Beloved. God wants us to wake up every day knowing that we are the beloved of the Lord, unconditionally loved and wholly approved.

The more we know how much we are loved and treasured by God, the more we can expect good things to happen in our lives. We can expect to be healthy and whole. And instead of becoming easily frightened or threatened by anything or anyone, we become confident that we will win every fight of life when we realise that we are the object of God’s love.

That, my friend, is how your heavenly Father wants you to live. So live life today confident that you are God’s beloved!

my life is like a path.

2006-09-07T02:57:00.000+01:00

its been a while since i wrote anything here. been busy with nccf, the welcome campaign but i don't feel physically busy you know, its more towards the inner man. oh its just Spiritual Busyness haha thats how i put it. I thank God its not a routine, else ill just dry up. oh i'm speechless at the moment, and i shouldnt be up that this ungodly hour heh. goingofftobed ;)

The head and one body are one.

2006-08-28T12:51:00.000+01:00

Colossians 1:18
18 And He is the head of the body, the church, who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in all things He may have the preeminence.

I hope that it does not surprise you when I say that the head and body of an organism are one. For it makes no sense to say that the head is well but the body sick, that the head is rich but the body poor, or that the head is at rest but the body full of stress.

What does this have to do with us? God’s Word says that Christ is the head and we the church are His body. So Christ and the church are one. Christ and you are one! You cannot say that God sees Christ the head perfect but His body imperfect. Or that Christ is accepted but His body not accepted. The measure of Jesus’ acceptance with God is the measure of your acceptance with God! In other words, what Jesus is before God, you His body are. As He is, so are you in this world. (1 John 4:17)

Today, God wants you to lay claim on Christ being your head. Start believing that all His perfections, delights and joy that He brings to the Father’s heart, He has set to your account. And you will begin to realise that as Jesus is a sweet-smelling aroma to the Father, so are you!

The more you begin to see that you are one with Christ, the more you will realise that whatever you need right now, He is dispensing to you. If you are sick in your body, Christ your head imparts His health and healing to you. If you lack wisdom, Christ your head freely imparts His wisdom to you. If you have any lack, Christ your head gives you His exceeding riches.

My friend, have this rich revelation that Christ and you are one. You can never be separated from Christ your head from whom comes all the supply for your body and increase, power and wisdom, and enabling and anointing. So declare, “As He is, so am I in this world!”

big smash on the face.

2006-07-14T00:51:00.000+01:00

my dear Lord i got smack on the face by God's grace im so humbled now. i was fleeping through friendster, its been awhile now hmm going through familiar faces and then suddenly this girl caught my attention (yea girl again ok) and THEN i said to myself "ehh ? she looks so familiar" now you know when you browse through friendster you seldom look at their name but only their faces ahhh thats what i did la.. and then when i looked at the name my heart felt a little pinch..it is mua ex when i was form 3..

ok to be honest, after what she did and i did to her it isnt the most "wonderful" infact miserable for me.. so i labled her with the B alphabet last time ok not now.. but when i went through what she typed under "described yourself" i was shocked that she actually give glory to God which quotes "fearly and wonderfully made" then my brain got stuck and i was really humbled by God.. and im really happy for her man..really!! so mature respond.. btw shes lookin hot and kickin umph!!!! Amen

;)

2006-07-09T23:54:00.000+01:00

shortnote: The will of God is the desire of God. The Word of God is His will, and His desire. His Word is described as fire, because the Word expresses His will and His will is His passion.

fire

2006-07-04T18:03:00.000+01:00

shortnote : The fire of heaven can’t be second-rate, used fire, second hand, worn, losing its quality. God has only one kind of fire: ever- fresh, bright, flaming, leaping and brand new

.

2006-06-28T00:37:00.000+01:00

my heart is healed from a big tear. i guess disappointment is the kind of fear i am afraid of. why am i going round and round again i ask myself. i tought i made a promise to myself not to fall into that same hole again. this time the hole is deep and i hit really hard on the ground that the feeling is as if my heart have a hole. why am i such a slow learner i ask God, and why must it has the same situation as before, i cried. but worry no more for i am healed a lil wound left but i am healed. i am not writing this entry in disappointment, im not, but rather a log i might want to read back in future and laugh at myself.

a lil bit of recap, what sort of girl do you like she asked, but i refused to tell whispering at my own heart, i said " a girl like you ". i smiled back and replied, it is not my time yet i suppose. so i add on in a funny way "no girl would want someone like me" she smiled and said something i should not type coz its not humble lol. hmm this should remind me in future =)

pain

2006-06-26T23:29:00.000+01:00

dear Lord my hearth is hurting please heal me. Amen

shalom

2006-06-14T16:32:00.000+01:00

shortnote: God is the living God, but He is more than just being alive. He IS life, the source. God does not draw life from anywhere else, only from Himself. He does not depend an anything else for life, and can never be let down. He does not need sustenance for He sustains all things. John 1:4 “In Him is life and the life was the light of men

yep.

2006-06-11T01:32:00.000+01:00

i was at dinner today with the same bunch, on my right was michelle and left was leo lee, and as i count all of them at the table, all of them are either attached or married. i ask God "when is my turn?" then out of a sudden, i gave myself a big smile assuring myself that Jesus is saving yours for the best. That smile is of God together with the presence of "YES!! or OMPH!" meaning SURE THE BEST ONE.

watched memoirs of geisha the story began with the quote "My story is sad to be told" truly a brilliant movie. not really good at commenting, but the story line and video shoot was very impressive. i admire japanese culture so much of discipline i must say, the people,life style, communication are the things i got attracted to. their fashion of communication is in a way profound to me. japanese girls is always quiet and speaks only when required.. ahhh so like my dream girl..despite of her looks too. im off tired ;)

Questions.

2006-06-10T01:33:00.000+01:00

i got a question here, Why did Jesus heal all ?

in spirit and in truth.

2006-06-05T20:18:00.000+01:00

quote of the day "The Gospel creates the desire for a good life, the will to perform and the power to change. In Christ people can repent; without the Spirit they cannot. That is why our preaching must be in the Spirit. He is the effective element. Our words may be logical but the Spirit plants reasons in the heart. "

hahah yay

2006-06-01T03:34:00.000+01:00

short note: went clubbing for class reunion.. phone number retrived = 0 jajaja not bad not bad

awaken!

2006-05-29T11:31:00.000+01:00

short note : One of the wonderful things about God is His willingness to be represented by man. It seems impossible for a mere human to represent him in any way at all. But the Spirit bears witness that we are the children of God -- and His children bear His image."

Nothing Wrong With God, His Word And You

2006-05-19T03:07:00.000+01:00

Hebrews 10:14
14For by one offering He has perfected forever those who are being sanctified.

Sometimes, when we are not receiving our healing, breakthrough, restoration or miracle child, we can’t help but think that something is wrong with us. We tell ourselves, “Nothing wrong with God, nothing wrong with the Word, so something must be wrong with me!” My friend, if you think that your miracle depends on you, then you are on rocky ground.

In the old covenant, we see this “it’s all up to me” demand put on man. God’s part was to bless His people, but only if they played their part by obeying all of His laws. If they didn’t do their part, not only would they not be blessed, the curse would come on them.

Most of the time, they ended up under the curse because they just could not keep all of God’s laws. So God found fault with that covenant because though He wanted to bless man, man’s sins made it difficult for Him to do so. Man himself was the weak link.

In the new covenant, man has no part to play except to believe and receive. The new covenant of grace was cut between God the Father and God the Son — both infallible and more than able to keep the covenant.

God the Son is man’s representative. Jesus is representing you and I. So in this covenant, how much we can receive from God depends on how good our representative is, how perfect His obedience is. Of course, Jesus is the perfect Man with perfect obedience. So in Him, we are qualified to receive all the blessings of God! We only need to believe and receive.

Jesus’ blood has been shed for the remission of all your sins. You are now the righteousness of God in Christ. (2 Corinthians 5:21) By His one perfect sacrifice for all your sins, He has perfected you forever.

Today, the devil has no right to tell you that you cannot be blessed because there is something wrong with you. So as you are waiting for your miracle, you can say, “Nothing wrong with God, nothing wrong with the Word and nothing wrong with me!”

CF tonite

2006-05-12T23:06:00.000+01:00

hehe tonite i did not pay attention at all..im behaving crazyily too but its much fun..but it seems God is trying to make me laugh, make me smile.. using ppl in CF to you know lift up my laughter..this has been overflow..it is great to see dayo is changing i love to see ppl change it magnifies God's glory..but i felt a lil bit disappointed when ppl leave all the chairs lying around..its not about the chairs but the heart of men..now i felt how Ps benny hinn felt when he talked about preachers talks alot about money, how to make yourself look good and principles to success..well these things are important but its still secondary..

that includes me also..quote from God, "my son, when God created the heavens and earth, it cost Him nothing. infact He did it with Joy. But when it comes to saving you, It cost Him everything" and when everytime i was reminded my heart burns..and one more thing, God said "When you have the burden to win souls, other things is just useless to you" in other words, when you are christ-like other things are not important already..i ever felt that feeling..

last time i remembered telling fiona that i had this body transportation and i woke up in the middle of the night and was afraid. therefore i went on msn and saw fiona and talked to her about it.. she told me to outkast everything that is not from God and indeed i felt the peace of God but right after that, i got this dream me preaching at monument first, then to the whole nation and now, the burden is back.. when i start looking at lost souls my heart wept.. what is this Lord? im my heart it echos "quick! tell them about Jesus" same thing what reinhard bonnke had..

he said " i dont wanna be a dollar millionaire but a soul millionaire hallelujah.. and just now when i pray infront of the altar, i looked at everyone, and lay my hands upon the crowd and prayed..for a person like me, since im that shy kind err i dont know why i did that but greater is He who lives in us than He who lives in the world.. there is already a prophecy inside me, giving me the feeling that God is doing something big in me after my studies.. i just pray for obidience..Send Me Lord Send Me i will GO!!

a big -___________-"

2006-05-09T13:07:00.000+01:00

friend actually called me just to write a testimony for herrrrrrrrr -_-" but it was really nice talking from someone farrr... i miss miri lah.

*phone rings* [private call]
me: eh ? muahah dad send me money liao must be. heloooooooo ?
fren: alo chrisssss... hehe.. 3 am belom tido lagi ke.. ?
me: ko siapeeee? why suddenly speak in malay..i bukan muslim la
fren: aiyah you idiot...now u know?
me: ohhhh..oiiiiiii!!! *excited* apa u mau.. 3 am call ppl u should be more civilize ok? haha
fren: aiyaa boring leh.. miss you..chit chat laa... you become high priest already ar? *laughs*
me: havent yet.. now im writing my epistle. hahah
fren: sure or notttt untill 3 am arr
me: no lah i doing assignment consider epistle la tu jaja.
fren: eh can do me a favour ? but have to promise me first.
me: wah if you ask me to marry you i ma very cham ? haha
fren: no la can u help me write testimonial?
me: -__________________-"
fren: hahahahah thats not the main purpose laa.
me: cilaka i doing assignment u call me all da way just to ask me write testimony.
fren: write properly arr.. pleaseeee
me: zzzzzzzzz ok... need to get back to my work.. time for you to pray hahah
fren: ok good luck on your epistle. haha
me: siao *click*

boyy i miss my friends back homeee... *hugss*

some sharing.

2006-05-03T17:40:00.000+01:00

all of you sweet child of God may i start with a verse which will bless you. Rom 10:15 And how shall they preach, except they be sent? as it is written, How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things! what a beautiful verse.. i wanna share with you, what God has been speaking to me and He said to me go tell the comittee what i have share with you.. before i start i will lay my hands upon you and ye shall be blessed right after reading this sharing.. like what ps desmond shared Spirit-filled ohh hallelujah ive been thinking of it all night long.. and God remind me, in Spirit and in Truth my son in Spirit and in Truth.. just these words it brings great GLORY of God..

2006 has been a life changing year for me, and God has put this desire in my heart. i bet God place it in all of your heart. what then ? ----> proclaiming the gospel to everyone/lost.. i dunno to you, but for me its a revealation. winning lost souls for Jesus is His will.. what then is the will of God ? it is not God's will that any should perish my friends..how important lost souls is my friends? i would say it cost God everything.. you know when he created the heavens and the earth or the rivers, it cost him nothing.. when he created the tree of Life and etc.. it cost him nothing, but my friends, when it comes to saving me, cal , ps desmond, leo lee, carina, chia ying, eugenes, quence, mickey , kC and all those i missed out but God did not, IT COST HIM EVERYTHING my friends... it cost Him his best to you.. His only and begotten Son. Hallelujah...

Therefore do not focus on anything that makes you feel better or look good..it is not important, the world is going to hell and all people care is their own need.. John the baptist dint look good when he preached the gospel, Elijah did not even look good and Jesus the SON OF GOD did not look good!! infact when He got hung on the cross, he is covered with spitted, covered with torn fles, dragged on the floor and covered with stripes..ohh and guess what for my friend ? to be healed..this i encourage you my friend, Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness. PUT HIS INTEREST AHEAD OF YOURS!! PUT EVERY BEST OF YOU FOR HIM!! dont give him the last penny, give him the first fruit!! and thou shall be bless..hey we're talking about God almighty here SHALL be added unto you.. Deut 8:18 But thou shalt remember the LORD thy God: for it is he that giveth thee power to get wealth.

you know why is it important for you to tell these people the good news? because there is one thing Jesus can not do, one thing the angels of heaven cannot do too but you can do my friend, Jesus cannot say "once i was lost and now i am found, once i was dead and now alive..once i was a sinner and now i am made righteous in God's eye" Hallelujah.. He cannot say that, angels cannot say that because the blood is not shed for both Jesus and the angels. He cannot do this for himself because He knew no sin nor angels knew the love of God because salvation belongs to humanity only..the angels wished they'ed preach the gospel but God say No, because the blood was not shed for them...

It was shed for you my friends, and He does this all because He loves you..without the blood, there is NO grace and NO love. Therefore i urge you all to preach the gospel to all the nations (does not mean cross country.. u can start the nation of your work place.. the nations of your school.. in your house!! there are nations too!!) ohh as i share this message i can feel the devil's trembling..Hallelujah. you all, Jesus love you..

lalala ~ lalaland

2006-04-28T00:32:00.000+01:00

she was the girl from somewhere
magical marine parade
I want to sing you this song
disappearing in a fade

she caught me looking at her
from the corner of her eye
over me over you
she said run over you over me

and in a blinding flash
we ended in a crash
I got her to her feet
and then she smiled at me

Neec

2006-04-23T23:01:00.000+01:00

the conference was great, gave me a deep impact towards God!, things i dint aspect to happend, HAPPENED. The fire inside me right now i tell u, is useless if a fire extinguisher is used.. apart from rev joel, ok imma be honest, his sermon was all haywire but i must admit, he is really gifted in preaching.. if you give him 5 hours of his time, he would go over!! the person who really inspired me was tony anthony.. man his testimoney was really down to hell high up to heaven..like cheryl said "you will defininately like him 1 " i must admitt.. i shiok sama dia ;)

think he made 2 really good points..one is where he points out christians these days which worships with their hands up shouting out loud from a mountain to another, preaching their top solid quality sermons but do 'LESS' then what they talk..boy his wake up call flows along with the anoiting of God man.. i must admit, it is God.. second point was his short yet simple salvation presentation, smack right through everyone's face and the third point was not actually from him, but from God!! the salvation of 6 souls that talk itself.. my Joy i tell you, surpasses all human understanding..no theology can explain it..

his encouraging testimony makes me wanna go to all nations and be a witness to God..it gives me the burning passion to change the world..it open up my old dreams where i wanna become the preacher of the nations, the man of God, the riser of the dead, the guy whom his fragrance can heal the sick and a walking bible etc etc.. basically like the days of Elijah and Paul.. hmmm actually im getting back my old fire when i was in miri ohh man i miss those days.. remembered when i just got back from benny hinn's healing crusade.. the presense, anointing and how close my walk with God was and is to come!!! give me this uhmph!!!!! to just leave my course and serve full-time...and just talk about Jesus all day long..Lord i pray i would not lose this fire..add in more oil into the torch, so i can be a might vessel of yours. I AM YOURS LORD I AM YOURS...

complaint

2006-04-15T02:10:00.000+01:00

my cough woke me up..getting worst coz i refuse to listen to abba.. kept eating fried food, ice cream and stuff whatever things i like in my face...when i was half alseep, i was actually thinking of the stuff we talked about in mangos...recalling back what apple said "chris is someone that thinks everyone likes him one" that really struck me right inside.. and the other things that was really disappointing is, she mentioning things that i never mention to her.. how sad.. that would be the last thing on earth i would ever say...

hmm am a person that usually let go of things easily but dont know why today i have a long thought on that.. whether i should rebuke her or let her drown.. if i stand silent, im actually limiting God's word to her own understanding..and i know everyone has this shield of protection of (its okie la) inside than instead of (Lord im sorry) well that exist for me...yess im not saying as a friend or bro is christ we should find fault with each other or rebuke them all the time, listen to the Spirit.

I remember correcting other people too like the ones i really love, man it really hurts..esp those whom your really close with but because i love you as christ love me i will have this integrity of standing with christ not to human..for if i please men, i will never please God.. now im not saying that im a Holy cow.. we're still learning.. i just love what the H.S wrote in Hebrew 12

Heb 12:7 If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons, for what son is he whom the father does not chasten?

Heb 12:8 But if you are without chastisement, of which all are partakers, then you are bastards and not sons.

Heb 12:9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh who corrected us, and we gave them reverence. Shall we not much rather be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live?

Heb 12:10 For truly they chastened us for a few days according to their own pleasure, but He for our profit, that we might be partakers of His holiness.

Heb 12:11 Now chastening for the present does not seem to be joyous, but grievous. Nevertheless afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who are exercised by it.

now i always ask myself how do i dicern God's rebuke? or when people rebuke me how do i know its from God or not..then God open this passage to me.. and its in verse 9-10 ..paul use fathers as example ..now normally our Father/Friends correct us so u give them reverence..God says dicern this people who rebuke you for their own glory and benefit, are not of God..you can tell it by the way they rebuke hmm..lest we may be part-taker of His holyness..

now this last token really opened my eyes in verse 9 Father of our flesh correct our flesh but Father of Spirits corrects our Spirit..why i quote this because sometimes christian tend to think our Father tend to use accidents to correct us.. notice in verse 9 the last sentence is "AND LIVE?" not mati..i say this because i've heard of it..noo God is good He dont correct us on the outside through 'flesh' because He has already done that on the cross. but rebukes that comes in the Spirit is from the Father whom love us and gave himself for us..ohh man 3 am i should be writing my assignment.. hehe i find pleasure talking about the Lord.. kthxbye

sien.

2006-04-07T03:52:00.000+01:00

everytime when i watch love movie, damn it i always got effect by it... why God created me so sappy? everytime when i watch i felt everything is useless after that..just like now..i feel really stress man.. everything inside me like wanna burst out ... then i came to the point of self-pity.. im no good for anything, will never get 'the one' because i am so incapable of everything..the question of look at that person, that girl because she felt secure with him... a doctor.. or a lawyer.. bright future.. next time can have 10 kids..

this is where i come to myself, void.. total darkness.. no one will like u because.. you came from the street.. you have tattoo on your right arm...i bet when someone walk side by side with me they'll be a shame...next time even if you have a gf, you will never afford her..or when u guys get married.. you parents care neither more or less...or if you decide to bring yer girl back to your house..or to visit a house, i'd say "sorry i have no where to go.."in the first place i aint got no home.. everytime have to stay hotel issit ?

i guess, this world is full of disappoinntment.. therefore i ask God, what on earth am i doing here? i damn sien leh..loook at me im so sinful.. i cant even quit this and that habit.. how on earth am i gonna make a difference in this damn world?..then the wise One said.. have u forgot i have overcometh the world? do you think because of your sins, it can ruin My plans? isn't my Grace higher than your sins? behold my sacrifice saved the world how much more can i save you ? ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gerammmmmmmmmmmmm nya aku..haih sigh grrr..i know im gonna be ok later coz He knows me well..k thx bye

interesting, the Love of God.

2006-03-31T17:37:00.001+01:00

The son of man, came..

for he came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

He came so they might have Life and Life more abudently.

For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but so that the world might be saved through Him.

and he said..You are my friends, and the greatest love a person can have for his friends is to give his life for them.

He came, to take what you deserve, and give what He deserves

The Light of the world.

TOUCH!

Faith.

2006-03-29T04:36:00.000+01:00

hmm..im gonna write about "faith"...it seems a problem to all christians these days..and ask ourself "do i have faith?"..now dont define it as a problem, see it as a gift.. well the truth is it is a gift..from our heavenly Father..now there is two person in the bible that Jesus declares they have great faith.. 1 is the roman centurion and another one is the Woman from canaan.. now i wonder why the Jews did not have great faith...now both of this two character are gentiles..which means they do not know the Law..

LAW=WORKS, now it is when you know the Law, you would think they are ways to have great faith..now noo you just have to be Jesus conscience..the christians dominination have all kinds of faith.. they have faith for healing, they have faith for talking to God, they have faith for prayers.. basically faith is compartmentalize..noo the bible says Jesus is the Author and the Finisher of our faith..

now remember the story when God told moses to tell the people to paint their door post with the blood of the first born lamb? that blood symbolizes Jesus.. now take a family that has just come out from bible school for example.. the conversation script are as below.

Son : Father, did you put the blood on the door post ?

Father : Yes son,

Son : Father, but i think there is certain measurement of blood you have to put on the door post.. i learned that from the great school of theology..isnt it right father?

Father : with due to respect son, I'm not sure what kind of measurement God is using Son..we are dead, in the great school of theology they say u must know the measurement.. and then the angle for the faith u need to have a certain amount of degrees in it.. ohh nooo...

Son: father, do you have enough faith that when the spirit passes our house we will be saved?

Father: Nooo!!!! we're doomed..

Son Neither do i..i don't have enough faith... :(

how many know that when the spirit of God passes the door post they will still survive?.. now it is for God too see the Blood not them to see the Blood...and what are they looking ? thier own faith..measuring whether their faith is enough to make the spirit of God to pass by the door post.. now question are they conscience of what God told them ?

God says when i see the blood i will passby..now if you see Jesus all nothing but Jesus, God calls that faith.. faith is not for you to see but God to see.. your part is to focus on Jesus and God calls that faith..look at the girl who had 12 years blood condition.. all her focus was on Jesus..she says "if i could ONLY touch his garment and i will be healed" never lookin her ownself..

chritians these days (not comdemning your nor saying myself as a prefect child).. when they fall sick..their first mind set is to take medicine..now where did the conscience go?... im not against doctors here =P ... they serve to keep people alive..

but know the real value of the blood of Christ that was shed on the cross..Faith is not believing something that is GOING TO happend, but faith is beliving something THAT HAS ALREADY happened.. which is the finish work of Jesus.. He was wounded for our transgrassion, bruised for our iniquity.. and by His stripe we are healed..He so loved you that he gave himself for you that you may have this life in abudance..

now you wanna have great faith, see how Jesus sees.. when He saw a disabled guy.. Jesus sees him standing with his mat and start walking.. When Jesus sees a leper, He Sees them cleanse.. so many examples in the parables.. you know when u read the bible, your not there to learn SOMETHINGS, your there to learn about Someone.. and His name is...and the bible says as you learn about Him.. you become the image of Him..

now what we normally do is put Jesus as the second hand, our things first hand.. switch it!! change the first hand to Jesus.. for example when your doing exercise, do not put your trust in exercise, put your trust in Jesus.. you see the focus here.. same as it goes for vision seeking, prayer meeting..the H.S is here to teach us ALL THINGS..be Jesus your picture.. pre-vision of our CF is combined with the ministry + the process + the people + the gifts + Jesus..

now when you have pictures from God, dont limit it to that picture only, look bigger!! we have untill 2007 in mind.. but Jesus have generations..u know what i meant..ask Jesus to turn the odinary water into wine.. and He will provide the best to you.. let Him turn the ordinary into extra-ordinary.. hehe just keeping your fire burning.. i'm lovin it'

thinking of u brian..

2006-03-25T02:24:00.000Z

i was recaping back.. on the night of the incident.. i feels really fresh.. ppl calling me at 3 am.."WAKE UP BRIAN JUST GOT ACCIDENT!!" i tought i was still dreaming dude.. and i went back to sleep... untill i heard horns right outside of the house..woke the whole house up.. with my running.. my freakin hell this is no joke man.. when i was in the car i almost pee in my pants.. i was really really shocked...brian why so soon ? go up there tolong Jesus seperate letter issit.. i miss u man...i belom lagi get married.. haih how to show u my future wife ? like u used to say.. .taipaa laaaaa... hehe different already now brian..i did told u right last time.. ive got Jesus now.. if can u pray for me lor.. hehe be more fruitful.. i blardee lonely weii..christian girls are totaly different..expectation ebit high man.. u tell me how i manage? hahaha... nvm i got God..

life is different now ler.. all grown up edi no more irc..im soon getting my master..i belom tau la how i gonna start my life.. not really clear picture now.. i cannot become like last time know.. firestarter hehe.. i really really miss you man.. why dont u shake Jesus's hand and ask him send u down for a while.. we go yamcha..? apa macam ? on me man.. i pakai pound streling... pray for me ya.. i really miss you briannn damn why u have to leave so soon...

shame on me!

2006-03-17T03:28:00.000Z

sometimes a high megapixel camera is NOT really that good.. dont have good balance when pictures are taken.. the higher megapixel it gets the more pimples and unwanted stuff coming out from you face is exposed..

only 16 and above please. just playing around with my camera and this is my first shot.. ;)

i got rabbit hehe cute one!

2006-03-12T22:26:00.000Z

mmm this is so cool YK and michelle got me a rabbit.. so cool and i called it sniffy.. because it like to sniff around.. very cute one somemore... mmm but she pee on my bed.. not very God tonite im gonna have to use my sleeping bed to sleep..but since shes soo cute i'll let her go la this time... i cannot speak anymore shes just so cuteeeeeeeeeee ...

not use to taking picture

backside.. cute right, wait untill u see the paw and tail..

zoom in shes not use to the flash.. room too dark

hmm shes got alot more visitors than me :P haha

lalala my bday is gud.

2006-03-11T02:33:00.000Z

hmm what to write leh.. 7th of march's celebration is good.. today's celebration is also good coz i can see most of my friends.. am i making sense here..well for me it is not a big issue anymore..so old already lor.. 23 for christ sake.. my birthday wish for this year is a lil bit different hmmmmm...i assume God knows what are my request are.. all i've asked God when i made my birthday wishes is the question "When" hehe i know it sounds deep.. well this year's birthday i receive quite alot pressie and guess who won the present of the year ? yeah his name is called timothy..

so sweet la .. he made this cad by his own.. guess how old is he ? 2 years old onli weii.. when i opened up the card my godness.. my tears flow.. cannot keep one this tears.. touched by a lil kid...i think in the end of the day what matters IS the HEART.. manufactured by God.. i learned something really cool.. a great revealation from God.. what matters is not how smart, not how cool, not how good looking, as long as He/She loves God can already... wahh imagine God's word ends with 'already'.. if your looking for a partner in life...look for the one who love God's the most.. wahh simple and powerful.. i love my life ;) Amen.

The Holy Spirit.

2006-02-24T01:32:00.000Z

hehe ok im gonna talk about the beauty of THE Holy Spirit also known as the helper, the comforter ..John 14:27 But the Comforter, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in My name, He shall teach you all things and bring all things to your remembrance, whatever I have said to you.

Joh 16:7 But I tell you the truth, it is expedient for you that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Comforter will not come to you. But if I depart, I will send Him to you.
Joh 16:8 And when that One comes, He will convict the world concerning sin, and concerning righteousness, and concerning judgment.

last time i use struggle with this passage..well hmm why does the Holy Spirit convict us as our sins? i don't know why i disagree with this statement..its like the HS is a nagger instead of comforter..its like when your standing on a cliff he pushes you down..the word "CONVICT" is a very strong word..basically to prove that the criminal is wrong..

hmm now error..misunderstanding..if the HS condemn us of sins then.. the passage in ROM8:1 "there is NOW therefore no condemnation for those who is in Christ" would be useless..He is either for us or against us..Heb 10:17 also He adds, "their sins and their iniquities I will remember no more." would also be useless..

now how? so i kept reading the passage..then eii HE convict the world concerning SIN (SINGULAR) then the next verse Joh 16:9 Concerning sin, because they do not believe on Me; ...read on.. straight to the point..the mother of all sin is the sin of unbelieve.. then what do we have to say about the thing inside that tells u of ur sins? i believe it is your conscience.. how we know what is good and bad is from the tree knowledge of good and evil..we KNOW what is good and bad to behonest.. what we always forget is the promises of GOD..Jon 14:27 ..And bring ALL THINGS to your rememberance..instead of pointing you at your sins..the HS will remind you that Your the righteouness of God in Christ Jesus.. you are COMPLETE in christ.. YOU ARE THE CHILD OF THE MOST HIGH GOD...now that is GOOD NEWS..

dont prove God wrong prove Him right..well means we can sin whenever we like ? Rom 6:2 Let it not be! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it?
if you sin you repent..end of story..some might not agree..hey im against sin.. its just when i keep looking/judging my own sins i lose my focus on Jesus..i.e. the HS Says " ok chris today.. i will remind you of your sins of lust..you look at girl too much..you should not do that u know..how many times must i tell u? u think Jesus die for free issit.." wahh sounds more like a nagger to me..then u judge other people's sins..then start becoming a nagger..who are you to judge people's sins ? are you crucified ? it leads to no whereeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..

but NO..mr sa tan..u are conquered..i believe it is the fight of faith..beliving on the finish work..for the righteous shall live by faith..right believing produces right living..ahah what am i typing :P AMEN

yawn

2006-02-11T11:59:00.000Z

good morning..its been 39414 years since ive blogged.. hehe and i feel uneasy.. null value in my mind now...what to write about..ok i shall write about the name called 'Abba' which means father in hebrew..in the old testiment before the new covenant God always reveals himself as the Lord of hosts, Jehovah nissi, Jehovah yahweh etc.. but how i marvel why these names cannot be found in the new testiment or the new convenant.. and it brings me back to the cross.. God SOSOSO loved the world.. that whoever who believes IN JESUS will not parish but have eternal life.

in the old covenant the people in israel was labeled as children of God but when the Son of Man comes He gave us the adoption of Sons..now Sonship is far greater than children!! in the old testiment they were children not Sons because sonsship is of full adulthood. God wants our relationship with Him just as we call him 'Abba' father that is how close that intermacy is...and Jesus died so you can call God father..

now tell me as a father do you want your child to call you other names besides by father ? or daddy? of course not!! for example.. you are a pastor named 'Yahweh'.. and your daughter has nightmare in the middle of the night, isnt it strange if your daughter call you and say "pastor yahweh.. pastor yahweh.. will thou cometh and prayeth over me and outkast this nightmareth ?" of course not..but but chris our God is God almighty.. he is big.. yess he is big nor almighty but HE is my FATHER my ABBA..He has all this title High Priest, Lord of hosts and King of kings but he is still my daddy.. look back at the illustration..the was wounded for our transgression so we might call Him abba...how worthy is the Lamb that has been slain.

Glory to thee.

2006-02-05T21:52:00.000Z

Isaiah 53 lists this exchange.

On the cross, Jesus So that we might
was devoid of beauty | have His beauty
was rejected | be accepted
was a man of sorrows | have joy
was despised | be esteemed
carried our sicknesses and pains | be healed
had no peace | have peace
bore our sins and shed His blood | be forgiven
did not have anybody speaking for Him before God | have a High Priest in heaven speaking for us forever

ohio!

2006-01-19T12:30:00.000Z

good morning altho its way pass morning hehe its 1230pm! thanx God for the new house..its VERY NICE..but the crappie thing is..the family living above me.. they are soooooo noisy man..i feel like slapping them to middle east..seriously!! rageeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! damn somemore ask us not to make noise..now whos the hypocrite? argh! ok chill..the reason why i woke up at 1230 is because of them la... 3 am or 4 in the morning start making noise already!! ohh boy if this remains i need to take action argh!!!11oneone...ok chill talk properly..but i scared my hand talk first :( ... told mr mohammed i assume they will be more considerate OK? but noooooooo.. hehe at least these few days is better than last week..ok enough i just listen to the sermon of love yesterday sososo be still! pray for me ;)

dear journal

2006-01-04T00:32:00.000Z

assignment week makes my hormones go wild.. it is by far the best week i ever had..its like i havent done anything in my assignment, but when i look through my works, man im almost there.. everyday is like.. wake up...eat instant noodles.. grow fat.. do assignments.. rest .. do assignment.. play some guitar.. then at night watch some movies.. before i go to bed i listen to some sermons.. what a life! but sooner or later its gonna end!

im gonna move soon.. into 2 bed apartment.. well i hope im please with the house coz im viewing it tomorrow.. and i hope its not so expensive coz my poket is empty!! oh Lord direct debit some cash into my account please.. thanks.. yess i claim the promises that you paid on the cross hallelujah.. for u came to take what we deserve and give what you deserve.. ohh precious God your grace is so abundance!!
assignments is bad coz

- it makes u grow fat
- people always say your answer is wrong
- you stuff yourself with whatever you have in the room
- right after you eat, you feel sleepy
- it makes you feel quilty if you hang out too long outside

below are some silly things i wanna share haha! click on it to enlarge

wah lao

2005-12-14T23:08:00.000Z

Do i look like a pornstar? *cough* far from being one la.. my body can contribute la but someone sent me msgs like this in friendster.. more than twice ok.. i feel so sad hahaha

Hi Chris. How are you? I was just browsing some people around here and came across your profile. I'm new around here, actually not too sure how long i'm gonna be here. I am from the United States and i'm here for my job and also going to school. I just joined friendster and was just looking for some friends, people to hang out with while I am here. Your profile caught my attention so I wanted to contact you.
Would you wanna chat sometime? Get to know each other and hang out sometime? That would be cool.
I also have a lot more pics I can let you see if you want.
If you're interested I tell you what...If you don't mind, why don't you email me at my regular address. It's just a lot more convenient for me 'cause I don't come on this site often and I am used to checking my other mail every day. My username there is SweetSunFlowr05 the at sign and hot mail dot com.
Sound good?
Hope To talk to you soon.
See ya!

Sara

lalala

2005-12-09T05:31:00.000Z

I can show you the world Shining, shimmering, splendid Tell me, princess, now when did You last let your heart decide? I can open your eyes Take you wonder by wonder Over, sideways and under On a magic carpet ride A whole new world A new fantastic point of view No one to tell us no Or where to go Or say we're only dreaming A whole new world A dazzling place I never knew But when I'm way up here It's crystal clear That now I'm in a whole new world with you Now I'm in a whole new world with you Unbelievable sights Indescribable feeling Soaring, tumbling, free wheeling Through an endless diamond skyA whole new world Don't you dare close your eyes A hundred thousand things to seeHold your breath - it gets betterI'm like a shooting starI've come so farI can't go back to where I used to be A whole new world Every turn a surprise With new horizons to pursue Every moment red-letterI'll chase them anywhere There's time to spare Let me share this whole new world with you A whole new world That's where we'll be A thrilling chase A wondrous place For you and me

a whole new world.

2005-12-05T02:50:00.000Z

hi diary, its been weeks miss u.. sigh assignments been taking lots of my time but i enjoy doing it.. as in enjoy cutting and paste with a proper reference.. see im talking about assignments again.. STOP. well gonna be a short entry below are a few sharings.. hehe

1.Not life after death, but life in the midst of death.
2.Not victory after trials, but victory during trials.
3.Not strength over against weakness, but strength through weakness.
4.Not joy when sorrow is gone, but joy while sorrow is here.

hmm something is feeling funny inside me it makes me ticklish and excited is there a feather inside me? hehe should i proceed or should i stop? wait psst let me ask God.. He said go slow.. keep seeking Him.. goo slow mooo chris goo sloww.... ;)

tail -f /var/log/messages | presentation tomorrow.

2005-11-22T15:30:00.000Z

besok i ada presentation.. menakutkan kan ? today we did our rehersal for 2 hours.. we kept on repeat repeat.. laugh laugh .. tease tease.. scold scold.. and much more.. when theres always presentation my heart goes *wueewuauauchengcheng walala bang bang* stress la weiiiiiiiiiii.. Lord!! halp.. when im stress i am uhmmmm gila.. ok now u can call me chris bin laden.. im a friend of osama.. we are from the stress-me club.. if you want stress, dont look anywhere else GO TO chris bin laden club...seriously i had fun doing this course.. at least makes me smile more then i did the previous course.. actually im quite happy today.. for the Lord reminds me of the cross..i can feel his breath ...thank God he dint say 'i am finish!!' or did the saints listened wrongly?? hauhau joking.. God forbid ..

oh yeah speaking about the wheather, it is toooooooo hfhfhf cold man...imagine i wear glove?? this morning i went eldon to look for snow cap.. but gah too small leh.. they dont sell the thick onesssssssss.............. someone donate to meeeeee... tkmax also takda...talking about donation.. i really need donation man... my pocket sudah kosong si.. gue tak bisa tahu macam mana nak survive kalo gue tak manage..speakin about malay i miss malaysiannasilemak.. it is sooooooooooooo niceeeeeeee teleport go back msiaa for a while...oiiiiiiiiiiii nonsense too much..
sekian sahaja adik adik sekalian jangan nakal naaakal ya

IT IS FINISHED TETTELESTAI

2005-11-18T01:06:00.000Z

finally the rock has come back to newcaslte.. opss wrong channel first project complete altho masih belom present but am glad that we made it this far.. last but no least i'd like to thank the Lord for all his wisdom and patience.. and also my group members, altho we're all from different planet.. major break through, barrier to communication.. the fun part is.. me and alex stalking at girls during meetings.. but hey we still got a year togather so keep stalking ngek... well to finalize this entry i would like to paste our conclusion for this project.. its like the words of victory!!!

CONCLUSION
In conclusion, the execution of the NBISC project has been a worth while experience, even though, it was not without some difficulties. Despite all that the consultancy did all that was feasibly possible to see that the project was completed and delivered to our clients , within it’s budgetary confines, time frame, and in good quality.

Consequently, we were able to design a simple but a good website that would be easy to access and navigate by just anybody with minimal computer knowledge. The website is also linked with a database facility that will be used by NBISC.Accordinly, as was requested in the brief, a marketing proposal that will significantly show case NBISC was prepared. The website and the marketing proposal were designed with the singular objective of placing our client on a very strategic position with its products and services orchestrated to attract it’s market segment.
In executing this project however, some problems were encountered, but were promptly taken care of through our contingency plan. Such problems include initial lack of understanding of the project brief, over shooting the budgetary estimate to mention a few.

Finally, we wish to thank our clients for finding us competent to execute this project, we hope that the quality of our job will endear us to you in the future.

wooooooooooohooooooo sekian sahaja tuan tuan dan permisuri sekalian *tot*

updates.

2005-11-16T10:03:00.000Z

i enjoyed encounter weekend..not very WOW but it top-up my spirit heh.. oh it is beyond words how much God love the world..only can be understood when we the rapture come.. well meet quite a few people.. mostly bbc (british born and confused) apart from that, singaporeans... nice people indeed..well duh their in Christ.. well at least i know what area i need to be involved in now.. well basically 3 of em.. preaching (cough) , worship (more cough) and doing everything.. i love doing everything man.. from cleaning toilets up to serving chinese tea in CF hehe..

i got like 7 hours sleep.. no less than that.. got class at 9 am ...i dont understand why human like toturing themself..start class at 9 am no one attend then the lecturer start mumbling up and down.. then the lecturer ask student some question .. they dont answer .. then the lecturer starts his mood mode again.. what you aspect most of the lads are blur in the morning.. especially people like meee mauahahha...got my timetable fully packed tomorrow haha got my excuse avoid assignments.. well need to finish at least 1 assignment this week to fulfill my conscience..

these few days, i dont talk really much.. hehe maybe the so-called talking-nonsense curse has been redeem.. need to lower down my nonsense really.. dont do me anygood.. altho it smack people right on the head but.. sometimes i think its too much.. dont think girls will fall for you with your nonsense.. they like erk sweet, smart, down-deep, profound ... good in everything.. open the car door for them.. and seriously, im non of the above.. but Jesus is all of the above haha...just imagining the result of me being serious...think me friends will circumcise me... that comes to the conclusion of self-focus.. look at Jesus chris and He will takecare of the rest. sekian berita pada hari ini sekian terima kasih.

sleep well, litte child the Lord holds thee new

2005-11-09T14:56:00.000Z

wah finally presentation completed.. one down 1 million more to go sigh... thank God only got one class today.. feel ebit tired ler wanna faint already but then feel like writing pulak.. tomorrow thursday already.. then the next day is the first day of the weekend.. i wanna go encounter weekend.. i think i might goo since i havent experience.. pretty busy with work these days.. with groups with meetings with CF stuff no time to think about myself.. its just giving giving giving..

okie la finally made my decision this friday go encounter.. yesterday i heard a really good sermon from pastor prince.. Jesus is our mercy seat.. talking about leviticus..how again we always fall from grace.. it is so obvious everytime when we try to qualify ourself for God's grace doesnt seem to work.. how often when we pretend to be smart God's grace dont come around helping.. it is when we are foolish as the scripture say the grace of God is right there for us...sometimes we act without thinking.. why everytime when were told to look at God's goodness we were looking at our own weaknesses ? as in do i have enough faith or not and stuff ? stop there.. i tought it is the blood of Christ that saves...why you have to look at yourself when you know your not capable ? the scripture says loook at Jesus for transform into his image.. and yet we see preachers talking about behavior motivation..

we know whats wrong with ourself dont need for others to tell lol.. that is why the gospel is called gospel of grace and peace... clearly it says to preach God's grace so that we can look at his goodness.. in rom 2 the more we look at his goodness repentance come along... now when peter was at the boat when jesus told him to trow the net.. and he did, what happend man.. the net broke.. after seeing God's goodness what did peter say ? " depart from me O Lord, for i am a sinner" by seeing God's goodness repentance comes...oo can write on and on but.. i feel like eating doritos now....ok la im going encounter weekend ngek.....salam sejahtera

pix post

2005-11-04T01:43:00.000Z

hehe.. i was going through my pictures and i saw some of the really OLD ones.. and i really like them uhm pix when i was small and ENOURMOUS btw.. below are as follows :

this is the 4 blind mice.. first from the right, ME , my cousin, my step bro, francis hee.. cute right all of us.. ok shadap already..

me and uncle moh not my dad.. btw his 'KAYA' is now the most famous in kuching i think.. home made kaya.. yummy

i look really fat.. uhm ok im fat .. well from the right, coussie arron, me, katie (coussie's wife), chloe .. i pretend to be gentlement la pegang payung.. :P

now these are all the ambassador of Christ, prayer warrior, typically insane mirian.. -> charles, chloe, arron, katie

the girl on my lap, naomi her script "chris koko where's my sweet" miss alot :)

this pic was taken when i was really drunk and pist. haha

and this one, was on sean's farewell.. i know blocking someones face.

last but not least a pix of cell grp taken in mich and yee kiat's place.. heee

laugh of the day

2005-11-01T00:02:00.000Z

this video made my day hehe..
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6739710473912337648&q=chinese&pr=goog-sl
feel like shooting them in the head ? patient.

whos the loser? hands up

2005-10-30T09:13:00.000Z

if someone would give me a gun for christmas i ought to shoot myself with it.. i dont know i lost the will to live.. its just u know *BAM* lights off.. i just wish Lord you takecare of that.. selfish indeed but i had enough.. are you the Lord of man kind ? then when is your timing for me ? i feel like smashing my head on the table.. but i freakin cant coz ill wake derrick up.. im blowing up.. what is wrong with me O Lord? hear my pray.. cloth me Lord with your robe for i do not want this anymore... can you feel it Lord? it hurt a milion times..take me Lord..take me to your mansion .. to my room you've prepared for me..i wonder what happened to the last me..who is always on fire for you..in this land i cant feel your presence Lord not when im in malaysia..JUSTTAKEMEAWAYICANTFREAKINGSTANDITANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOMOREFREAKINLOVEMOVIESFORME... w h y m e sekian terimakasih.

like that lor..

2005-10-27T14:07:00.000+01:00

my eye hurts because i hadnt got enough sleep.. my back hurts because i exercise too much... my tummy hurts because i ate too much.. my heart hurt because my wound was not fully stitched..my head hurt because i kept thinking about my assignment and my wonderful life.. the topic for today is hurt.. it can be a good and bad kinda hurt...so hurt doesnt mean its always bad.. its like falling down.. you just have to start brushing your knees and get upp if not u will never grow up.. some people learn from their problem some dont.. why ? because they love problems.. i was perplex at how human beings think.. all humans are crazy..

dont know what to do at the weeeeeeeeee hour.. i got class at 10 but man i feel so lazy to go.. dont give me all those lame excuses that this is my MSc or bla bla bla.. i know myself.. hehe yea lazy la.. i just dont feel like going to bed coz i wanna be online... i feel the urge to write something but all i do is rambling on and on... sayyyyyyyy should i eat ? again ? aiya dont want la.. know what? you know what people normally ask when they see you ? they got this really good habit la say "how you doin ?" i got sick of that question untill i answered " i lost the will to live.. can you help me ? " be prepare and behold no more other question after that...some people just cant talk i tell u.. they do the same crap again.. i mean they are not creative in talking at all.. i think that is why we choose people to hang around with.. its our nature ? but its not good yeah..

today's event is great.. calculated we got like 36 new comers.. really proud of God heee wahh alot of leng lui tooo =X but all speak in "ching chong" language sooo its like they know me i dont know them... booooooo .. i think i need to really learn mandrin afterall serious its hard for me to improve!! i improve only when i scold people.. which is not part of the gospel :P oooo ok
nampaknya itu sahaje berita i pada hari ini sekian terima kasih

aww!

2005-10-26T16:47:00.000+01:00

just watched the wedding singer by adam sanler and drew barrymore and yea i like it.. went like aww... man this movie is so sweet.. nice ending and then it makes u feel like a loser in the end...feel totaly crap coz never had what i want..there is two things you cannot do in life.. let me tell you this.. you cannot go beyond the word the Lord your God to do either more or less and you cannot go against your own concience...i like it when peter make this profound statement.. he said " where else could we go Lord. we got the word of eternal life ". pray for no more misery..

saw this really cool video by kelly clerkson in the gym.. and the lyrics i tell you.. it pierce my heart bit by bit..but the peace of God took care of it in the end.. the songs called " because of you" song from MR sa tan .. anyways just have to walk on and on right.. i hope someone come around my life.. owh yea yesterday i made a promise that ill never be mean to people.. even guys...im gonna buy all the movie by adam sandler i like it.. i like 50 first dates huahua.. different from other guys dont i.. toddles diary

jialat la

2005-10-24T08:20:00.000+01:00

wah lao eh i cant believe it.. guess what man.. i ate quite a late dinner.. i cant resist the curry chicken and thai style fried chicken made by mr derrick.. i failed but i got one good news.. i ate only a little yay.. err to define 'a little' FOR MY PORTION is kinda oh-man-im-so-full for girls.. what to do i got big tummy.. somemore right i can barely shit at night.. i mean the food that i ate during lunch doesnt seem to become taik.. think somethings wrong with my stomach.. yalar even i drank chinese tea.. those typical chinese tea man.. somemore use the chinese pot.. what to do ? PRAY..

first day of our vision seeking meeting was how to put it EXCELLENT bold + italic somemore. aiya sien already aku pergi mandi ciao.

my dream.

2005-10-22T20:11:00.000+01:00

OUT!!! please.
i tought about you today.. and believe me it wasnt at the right time..where did you bring me? i forget.. did u bring me to the same old place we use to go ? i miss it i really do.. i was dreaming the whole night long.. and yea the stupidest thing was i grin when the words went through my mind..well i was quiet tonight i try to control but i guess i pass while i was playing guitar.. i dint wanna go there but i let my imigination fly me there.. and it was really sweet indeed.. i recap on the post.. and i want it so bad to fulfil my own lust.. had an ice breaker game its something like "think of something that u did that someone dint do" the first time that came in mind was going after u... the time i spent.. funny innit 8 months of dieting just to go after a girl ? so selfish! and i dont know maybe its God's will do go our own way ? i judge too fast..i make decisions too fast and then after that i regret.. i go like owh fuck me..im standing in the natural now..where all the being think whats right just because they think its right..u know whats my mistake? my biggest mistake was knowing you.. my head is gonna fuckin blow.. im struggling inside.. i cant take it u know.. feel like singing this song.. walaupun aku sedar dan tahu tiada wanita didunia setanding mu.. oh fuck that crap...diary cant i be a little bit human at times? must i spoil peoples party ? now leo and min just drop by they went all the way to cheryls how to take my bag..God pamper me alot and i hate it :(.. i hate it when i have to feel awe all the time..but i still love God..i've change alot yes.. to be someone i never want to be.. bye diary thanxs for listening..

talk to the hand!

2005-10-20T19:58:00.000+01:00

hehe i was planning to skip class due to visa session but guess what.. the class got canceled aha now my conscience feels ebit relief..can anyone tell me why is my left eye twitching because it is dry ? i dont know it is weird, then i start sort of winking..which is a problem because the girls would tought i was winking at them..then they faint.. then they run away..tomorrow is friday and i like fridays because it is the first day of the weekend like monday..i feel so sien man now 30 more mins untill visa session..sighhhhhhhhhhhhhh why ? see below

i sigh because :

the time passes very slow and there is nothing to entertain me.
my body is aching due to the exercise i did.
i feel like sighing
i got too much assignments in mind and i dont know where to start + most of em are group assignments.
my hair grows very slow and it is ebit cacated.
my stomach is still very big and imaginging the amount of years i need to spend to exercise.
i spent too much money in a month time and it makes me feels ive spent almost 1 million RM in a freaking month
i need to seek for accommodation around fenham or heaton not near to the university because i already bought a bus pass for the whole decade..
there is no chic for me to see in the library ngek
my sister is getting married with someone 7 years younger then her but i dont mind
i still got a long way to go in life.
i have to GO NOW!

yawn

2005-10-19T07:49:00.000+01:00

hehe i quoted this from kenny's site. This video ought to teach all the guys out there a cold hard lesson: NEVER EVER hit a girl, or you'll be drinking strawberry milkshake the way he did.

In case you're wondering, the girl in the video with the sexy cleavage is Scarlett Ting. For the background story leading up to that incident, read Sassyjan.

today.

2005-10-17T23:44:00.000+01:00

eekkkk not enough sleep...slept too much maybe NOT.. woke up around like 11 am haha mandi ebit then go for group meeting.. and today is really a funny day.. we spent like 3 hours on our discussion and FINALLY we come out with some system *roll eyes*.. post pix first yay.. but quite blur i sux at taking pix..;(

an image of alex, the womanizer as in orally.

this is elwin, quiet but effective got alot of bright ideas but too complex for our system.

our resource/system analyst and secretary alwes and christine. (shouldnt have use those roles)

i dint take it.. it was uhmm . . . . . . . . . ME! huahua but alex pressed the button so we both do it.. well what u think man.. 3 hours in the meeting ? if not take girls pix then take guys meh.. think i saw her in CF.

then.. i went home and pengsan for a bit.. hit the gym at around 6 ++ hey man i was quite impress they installed a projector!! kewl.. but dont think the facilities change.. but management has improve.. THEN

went for prayer meeting.. alot of laughter.. dont know why we react differently with different kinda people is it the contrab we set in our brain.. but yeah i had alot of laughter today la.. God is stitching back my wound coz i tear it up yesterday sigh.. thank u Lord

hehe.. tipsy.

2005-10-16T09:26:00.000+01:00

tonight was okie to me.. strange.. i've actually achieve my new year resolution before it even start which is "talk less do more"...and sometimes i use it as an excuse not to talk with newcomer you know as in people that i am not really close with.. hmm i dont know whats wrong...you know sometimes when you talk to a person it gives you the reason to talk to he/she over again and again.. its like if you put 2 person that how to put it "same channel" you can talk like nobody's business lor.. but it is also said that the people with the same channel dont seem to go further than a normal friendship. that is such a legal term to you..dont really agree with that.. dont you choose a relationship base on your comfort with the individual ? crazy this world i tell you.. dont know why am i jumping into this kinda topic..i need to run the race wei.. now the devil is really weighting me with his temptation, a brand new topic of "relationship".. really really hate it when people take things for granted..blame who ? then the question of "who are you serving now" occurs.. confusing innit..haih no trouble look for trouble..talk bout something else la..

starting next week.. which is the first day of the week named "monday" , me christopher wong cjin sing a.k.a mr make things new will join the gym..hehe actually i made an agreement of a bet..with me frens which is, 1 month !! dont care how fat you are, you have to lose 3 kg per week.. man im going to trash myself.. i know i can do it.. no more evening meals, no more eating after 8.. that means during prayer meeting u'll be hearing my stomach groaning like a roaring lion.. owh i must GET RID OF 3 kg per week.. back to my old strict rules this time its unconditional.. exercise exercise exericse.. i might think of joining the GYM.. but then when i see the weigh i cannot tahan wanna carry them.. but man thats it i cant lift weight anymore.. muscle quite big edi =X okie "talk less do more" SAYA BOLEH.

only 1 month of suffering man only 1 month than i'll shout.. YES!!! and Lord also help me to put my trust on you, not on exercise to lose weight.. i need to focus more on you interms of everything really.. these few days gosh.. all on me me me.. guide me Lord for my weaknesses will be made perfect by your strength

in the lab

2005-10-13T23:38:00.000+01:00

hoh my first time blogging outside..i just read my assignment question and God help me its really uhm complicated..its like i dont know what on earth is going on..hate assignment man.. maybe starting class is not a good idea afterall NOT my father both on earth and in heaven will kill me lol..i need some sugar seriously i can feel the dizzyness exploding in the inner part of me head!.. but does that mean i got not enough sugar in my body ? what crap am i talking about.. now i have to plan already for my daily timetable i got a feeling that MSc is not easy afterall. if i only i could shout!! i feel like shouting NOW...15 mins left think chris think what to write..yesterday i went to nina's place and boy she whine alot from her work condition to going back to malaysia grand father story.. and i wasnt given any opportunity to talk.. and i went back late around 2 am and i ate supper which breaks my own conditional law..and i dont get enough sleep..and i dint bath in the morning..which makes me feel so sticky now..and why am i writing everything in 1 paragraph shadap!

you got alot of crap you know? hfhfhfhf bye going to class :D

why do this kinda stories stick on me? -.-"

2005-10-12T01:02:00.000+01:00

10th Grade
As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. she was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, black hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and i handed them to her. she said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. she was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broken her heart. she asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. she looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year The day before prom she walked to my locker. "My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did.

Prom night
After everything was over, I was standing at her front door step! I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she doesn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her gown and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another guy. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn`t see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". she said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! "I wish I did too..." I thought to my self, and I cried.

lazy to blog..paste sad stories.. enjoy

uhh sigh

2005-10-10T07:05:00.000+01:00

im sorry.. sometimes i lose my cool. thats why the word sorry exist and it's one of God's fav given to us.. still praying for salvation to come unto thee.

sien la..

2005-10-10T05:00:00.000+01:00

after all those faces & attitude and you come back to me asking how are you feeling? its like a revenge..but im still and calm for i know who's game is this.. i dont recall stepping on your freakin tail hoe. shit on you.

sigh

2005-10-08T09:02:00.000+01:00

wow i heard that you moved on got someone already somemore..boleh tahan.. no, its not too fast, but i am really suprise..hehe my fav pharse "aiya its okie la" i wish i can really stop using it. hehe so must be someone really deserving huh..waa im really glad for you.. must be someone who can really make you laugh..someone who has broad shoulder to hug hehe.. aiya serious happy for ya.. dont know what kinda feeling is this its a mixture u know.. but 70% goes to happy for you hehe.. as for me i dont know la.. still like that lor with the 1980 pickup lines hehe semakin berkarat...im tired really.. well was thinking back the times..was really fun alot of laughter hehe with all those stupid nonsense..

all i can do is hehe now.. really sooo happy for you ah..but i would like to thank you for stepping in my life once again.. and really a huge change.. the word you told me before i never forget.. that shows who i am today.. "go there go to church ah can make alot frens one" " o " how can i forget its so clear in my mind now..its like ur whispering on my ear.. it is still very clear.. well uhm i started uni already.. i like it actually.. sigh tired la not upset hehe.. thats all i think need to sleep..dont forget to bring porridge that guy ya.. takecare now ;)

story of a mum.

2005-10-07T07:33:00.000+01:00

got one story to share..pls read through...
My mom only had one eye.
I hated her... she was such an embarrassment...
She cooked for students & teachers...to support the family.
There was this one day during elementary school and my mom came.
I was so embarrassed. How could she do this to me?
I threw her a hateful look and ran out.
The next day at school...
"Your mom only has one eye?!?!"...eeeee said a friend.
I wished my mom would just disappear from this world.
So I said to my mom, "Mom... Why don't you have the other eye?!
If you're only gonna make me a laughing stock, why don't you just
die?!!!"
My mom did not respond...
I guess I felt a little bad, but at the same time, it felt good to think
that I had said what I'd wanted to say all this time...
Maybe it was because my mom hadn't punished me,
but I didn't think that I had hurt her feelings very badly.
That night...
I woke up, and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water.
My mom was crying there, so quietly, as if she was afraid that she
might wake me.
I took a look at her, and then turned away.
Because of the thing I had said to her earlier,
there was something pinching at me in the corner of my heart.
Even so, I hated my mother who was crying out of her one eye.
So I told myself that I would grow up and become successful.
Then I studied real hard.
I left my mother and went to Singapore to study.
Then, I got married.
I bought a house of my own. Then I had kids, too...
Now I'm living happily as a successful man.
I like it here because it's a place that doesn't remind me of my
mom.
This happiness was getting bigger and bigger, when...
What?! Who's this?!
It was my mother...Still with her one eye.
I felt as if the whole sky was falling apart on me.
Even my children ran away, scared of my mom's eye.
And I asked her, "Who are you?!" "I don't know you!!!" as if trying
to make that real.
I screamed at her, "How dare you come to my house and scare my
children!"
GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!"
And to this, my mother quietly answered,
"Oh, I'm so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address,"
and she disappeared out of sight.
Thank good ness... She doesn't recognize me. I was quite relieved.
I told myself that I wasn't going to care, or think about this for
the rest of my life.
Then a wave of relief came upon me...
One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house in
Singapore.
So, lying to my wife that I was going on a business trip, I went.
After the reunion, I went down to the old shack,
that I used to call a house... Just out of curiosity
There, I found my mother fallen on the cold ground.
But I did not shed a single tear.
She had a piece of paper in her hand....It was a letter to me.
"My son...I think my life has been long enough now...
And... I wont visit Singapore anymore...
But would it be too much to ask if I wanted you
to come visit me once in a while? I miss you so much..
And I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion.
But I decided not to go to the school for you...
And I'm sorry that I only have one eye, and I was an embarrassment
for you.
You see, when you were very little, you got into an accident, and
lost your eye.
As a mom, I couldn't stand watching you having to grow up with only
one eye...
So I gave you mine...
I was so proud of my son that was seeing a whole
new world for me, in my place, with that eye.
I was never upset at you for anything you did..
The couple times that you were angry with me..
I thought to myself, 'It's because he loves me..'
My son... Oh, my son... "
This message has a very deep meaning and is passed to remind people of
the goodness they have enjoy was because of others directly or
indirectly.
Pause a moment and consider your life!
Be thankful of what you have today compared to many millions who do
not live lives as you do!
Do spend some time in prayer for your mum out there!

lets think.. :)

roarr angry ppl around.

2005-10-05T23:00:00.000+01:00

you know what.. this world is full of angry people..seriously.. they got money, the time, the looks and all the worldly stuff and their still angry.. my goodness whats wrong with all these people.. cant you just smile for once? why do these people have to make other people's life ebit more misrable ? if you wonder along your life without smiling, laughing and you know ENJOYING then whats the point of moving on ? even the poor are much more happier than all these angry people to be honest i rather being poor than rich..the rich are full of arrogant, proud of themself and you can see that their nose are really really long.. but still not happy its a disease that has been eating THESE kind of people up.. ohh i know why.. all they need is Jesus..i mean people these days working hard like mad cows earning their pants off and what you get in the end of the day ? divorce.. failures.. sickness.. man you're paying everything down the drain and you end up gaining UNHAPPYNESS by paying your debt off..my goodness what am i talking about.. just all from what i tought of..

Jesus said. " come for who you are heavy and laden, come and i will give you rest. for my yoke and burden is light and easy. " hey brethen.. i got a secret for you.. and i tell you this great revealation from the Lord, learn the truth and the truth will set you free. For this Author came not to destroy but to give Life and above it all more abundently. Don't wait till your 30, when your a manager to have a marry life, dont wait till your on top of someone you dislike for ages to start laughing. LAUGH now brethen..enjoy the party.. don't follow the worldly wisdom.. follow Jesus learn HIM.. for with Him everything was made and without Him nothing was made..how your gonna WIN without him ? without the blesser? this tought just came in mind when i was queing up at the school office just now.. my goodness everyone was cursing and angry angry people all around..sour faces all around.. i felt so disappointed.. and withmyself too i am the culprit if you talk about waiting for somethin.. haha i also dont know what crap am i talking about..

got my first assignment today.. lol seem pretty worried already but no worries..notice what the Lord told his disciples according to the 4 book? he kept on saying "Do not fear, no worry, let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid, my son listen to me do not be afraid but believe and miracles will happen" aww see how much He loved us.. DO not worry for it withdraws your faith.. DO not worry for your indirectly saying to God that you are incharge of everything..but God says DO not worry for the WORK IS DONE!! it is completed at the cross..everything has been taking care of!! just guard your heart.. he said ABOVE all things guard your heart with all dilligence and out of it springs the issues of Life... hehe habis cerita ;)

huhu..

2005-10-03T20:16:00.000+01:00

my goodness i hate monday because..
- i have to wake up before 9 am for class
- monday always give me the feeling that weekend is wayyy too far away..
- people are normally grumpy because they need to work/study/doing-all-the-not-so-happy-stuff.
- the name of the day is weird.
- i have to remind myself what the lecturer tought me last week..which i dont really remember
- i have to eat sandwiches or instant noodles or pasta during lunch because its kinda a routine in my mind..
- worrying about the time i have to wake up the next day due to class..

i like weekends because..
- i get to hang out with my cool buddies.
- i get to eat all i want, whatever i have in mind and i have plenty of time to thinkkkkkk.
- i get to spend my money on take-aways or shoppin cause i use the hey-its-holiday-gift-yourself-a-break kinda excuses huhu.. but i never end up getting guilty.
- i can praise the Lord with all my brethen..it makes me feel social
- i get to drink beer or wine or whatever that makes me fly high.. in the bracket, on ocassions only.. (what a lie)
- i can buy drinks and put it in my friends house and call it an occasion.. self lying cow hole.
- i laugh more during the weekends.. i got no idea why but i need to work out on that.
- i can have lunch with my brethen right after church on sundays.
- i got people telling me to stop eating coz ive been eating to much
- i can eat with all the laughing exotic brethen of mind..
- i can make everyone laugh everytime without fail.. but depends on the company.
-i love weekend :)

ja ne-

uhh!

2005-09-30T21:07:00.000+01:00

stupid admin office gave me the wrong timetable.. every year like that never change..somemore this morning no class dint tell.. err maybe got la but i did not receive it hello? so me and a couple of china gang waited for like the rest of our life...somemore give me part-time timetable 'phui' slivaa stupid management.. but all of the lecturer roxs i can feel their sense of maturity in the way they speaketh huaa very profound. sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy !

mmmm miss u guys/gals.

2005-09-28T19:16:00.000+01:00

aiya.. i miss malaysia. i miss my friends man.. *waves* i coming homeeeeeeeeee.. on chinese new year somemore.. i think la.. but heck im coming home to partyyyyyyy i mean those kinda agak-agak kinda party ah.. no more junkie ;) arister called haih with his sad news again..

arister : c**** what are you doing..
me : i am going to sleep soon.. how u ?
arister : dont sleep first teman me..talk talk..
me : o talk about what..
arister : wei c**** i just broke up with my gf ahhhhhhh...
me : not suprise la.. how do you feel ?
arister : err.. ok lah.. you la c**** ask u dont go uk edi u see i have to go through all this shiet..
*noise from behind*
me : are you on drug
arister : hahahahahhaha
me : whos at the background..
arister : kar chi.. he is finally doing his degree.. somemore assignment haih still the same want to pay people do.. you la stupid introduce us to him..
me : muahahahhaha.. he still alive ah.. still doing this kinda job ah.. tak guna.
arister : woii when u coming back laa.. faster leh we miss you.. bring me some europian chic home can?
me : i think chinese newyear ler hmm.. europian cup got no chic.. u say u stop taking those stuff edi u bodoh..
arister : aiyoo give me a break la.. just break up maa so feel ebit sad.. haih.. i still miss porkchop.. shes the best i think..
me : i also think so.. angkat balik la.. still single what her ;)
arister : haih see first la.. what you doing ?
me: i gtg sleep already pig.. its freakin 3 am *yawn* talk to u some other time k? ill call.. send regards to all..
arister : c**** tak guna punya babi..
me : -_-" bye pig..

**************
was talkin to ethel as well...ahh really glad to hear from all the oldies.. busy running own business.. dont think busy la untill got time to talk heh.. must be selling wantan mee in jalan alor.. huahua waksssss miss M a l a y sia.......... ja ne-

i am a new creation.

2005-09-28T09:31:00.000+01:00

From this moment on I am a new creation the old has gone, the new has come ;)

core dump.

2005-09-27T09:14:00.000+01:00

why did you bring me back ? why cant you just let me go.. just let me drown in the deep sea will ya.. hell no i dont need your miracles.. noo i dont wanna see any of it anymore.. i'm really tired of being your children.. YES i am self-centered now so what? can you do me a favour, just cut my string will ya.. and let me goo.. i need some freakin space.. i need to breath.. yes i dont know whats wrong with me...why do you have to show me all those abysmal testimonies when im all down.. can't ya just let me goo...i don't belong to you.. even the world thinks the same..just let go..

and everytime i try hard to cut the string.. you bring me back into your palm.. whats the point O faithfull one? another question.. i've been waiting sick for this how long more O faithful one.. sometimes this crap just brings me down to looo.. yes it really cut the mood out of me...and that is why therefore i am cutting the string with you.. sick of learning thats all.. ja ne-

ja ne-

2005-09-27T06:49:00.000+01:00

good bye O Lord.

-_-"

2005-09-26T18:56:00.000+01:00

today is monday, and guess where am i ? correct, at home huhu writing this entry.. uhm strange where am i suppose to be ? the uni!!! but but but.. noo i dint skip class... got no class apa nak buat..uni got really cacat timetable.. i only got class on THURSDAY and i really hope its for the time being coz i wanna go to school pweaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.... i cant stick my phat backside at home i dont that 'kind' u know.. must go out one.. maybe its just the season eyyy.. they better fully utilize the timetable or i'll write a letter to my dearest supervisor, DIRECTOR of postgraduate Miss Linda Spencer with a grumpy title! UR TIMETABLE kanasai..uhh all i can do now is.. yess your right, watch anime.. but thank God tonite got welcome campaign.. else i got nothing to look forward..

yesterday.. i went to church and my oh my prayer answered to the max man.. the Lord of host fill all those chairs with newcomers and i was really moved, coz uhm i can talk ? chit chat? do some interview ebit.. of course asking the same question la.. then ask what? ehh how much your father make one month ah.. ? ooo lesser then my dad la.. my dad makes like freakin 1 mil one month huahuah ink that! noo laa.. where got so rich.. 3 milion only.. that one also deduct monthly expenses huahuahua.. my crap is really cheap.. see Lord i need to go for class.. i need too study.. its been a long time since i studied.. uhmm about 8 months now.. and im not so proud of it...

aiyer tummy hungry.. i shalt cabut... make some food yumm yumm! altho its 11 am..before that would like to share 1 testimony huaha uhm i broke my angkle but praise be to God, i got healed the next day after...and i was so touched supposingly i wont be able to walk after a few days or even weeks but the Lord had compassion on my angkle...it all came from mark 11:24 .. believe the impossible and it shalt be given unto thee.. the gift of Life.. ;)

testing me new cam -.-"

2005-09-22T22:48:00.000+01:00

hehe im testing my camera.. so i was playing around with it today and only got the chance to take a few snaps due to my busyness.. hehe so below are few pictures.. ugly and nice.. traaa

nice one along northumberland

this is a person called 'chris'

mygoodness its chris again...

will you every stop? chris! fatty watty!

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2005-09-20T21:27:00.000+01:00

my goodness my camera belom sampai.. im so grrr confused!! i dont know why.. im suppose to play with it today but nooooooooo mr postman has to take his own sweet time.. crap man i want my camera now i mean NOW... nooooooo icannot be patient about something ive been waiting for err about.. 1 week.. huehue anyboo, class is fine.. i mean its not even classes la its like an induction week huahua.. guess today is my last day attending.. why ? coz i almost fall asleep in the class without the teacher knowing huaa thats because im seating in front..

tomorrow i have to cook for welcome campaign huhu another busy day... sayy what else.. man from the day here in newcastle untill now, ive been spending ReALLY alot of monei.. so i check my clothes theres only a couple, when i check my other new stuff theres not much compared to the money i spent.......... hmmmmmmmm i wonder where it went...i think i spent it alot on food..today is the first day i wake up at uhm 8 am in the morning huahua (since i reach newc) and the most unpredictable thing happened.. hauhauh i went joggingness.. my goodness.. cannot believe right.. uhm i went with cy and hui min and guess what? i got really insulted.. coz i was LAST.. cannot believe lor.. and then guess what! half way of the jog my tummy ache jialat man.. so i walked huahuah but still got run ebit la.. to be honest, its really nice running early in the morning.. thats if the sun is not really hot la... what else what else...

waa yesterday's welcome campaign alot people .. praise the Lord but then horr the freakin people who listen to the MC.. they all go all loooo long with their conversation.. i mean come on!! grow up people.. when someone talks with a freakin microphone pay your darn attention la.. still in kindergarden or what.. no manners.. huahuah i was like that also last time.. but then the hall was FULL PACT.. and really glad la.. hehe... MR POSTMAN GET YOUR BLOOMING ASS HERE NOW!!! i want my cam! !@#$%^&*(

BAHASA MELAYU

2005-09-17T01:00:00.000+01:00

malam ini saya akan berbahas atau berblog dalam bahasa malaysia iaitu bahasa baku negara kita..setelah lama saya tak cakap dalam bahasa malaysia saya tiba tiba sedar bahawa bahasa malaysia saya semakin macam bercakap dalam bahasa PASAR.. malu betul.. nama sahaja tahu buat kari tapi cakap bahasa melayu tak pass.. saya telah mendapat B untuk BM saya dalam SPM walaubagaimanapun B itu bermakna Bodoh.. kerana? saya tak berblog dalam bahasa melayu yang canggih.. oleh itu, saya bercadang untuk ber cerita tunggu aku fikir ok...

pada hari ini saya tidak membuat barang yang bermakna kenapa? saya lambat bangun.. saya telah berilek dalam rumah selama 1 hari dengan itu saya berasa badan saya telah recharge balik..saya berasa gembira kenara hari ini banyak orang datang ke CF.. tentulah orang baru saya bersyukur kepada tuhan..semua semua orang banyak senyum kerana orang baru ramai sangat la...apa lagi.. saya baru sahaja sedar pengalaman saya dalam bahasa melayu untuk mengekpresskan perkataan saya sangat rumit.. oleh itu saya kena berfikir untuk dua kali..selalu nya saya berblog dalam masa 5-10 minit oleh kerana kerumitan ini ia mengambil masa yang panjang...

okeh la hari ini ssangat bagus..saya suka bahasa malaysia.. !!

i can't.. i just can't

2005-09-13T01:03:00.000+01:00

jajaja .. today welcome campaign was great.. satisfied..God's name magnified.. and i really can sense that all the newcomers really really appreciate the things we did.. uh well as a 'vessel' God use us as.. it was really good.. well i dint join in groups becauseee was incharge of the PA.. thats not the main reason thoo... haha the main reason was let me start it on how Lou asked me.. he said " ehh chris how come i dont see you sitting in groups talking to people ah.. ? " me "because i dont wanna end up getting girls number" my bad.. haha no self control.. why ? it happened last year!! but lost the contacts... but hmm on wednesday maybe i will...the Lord will guide me.. hey if we wanna walk on water we need to step out of the boat ngek ngek.. no more lose focus.. rally point of Jesus.. thats all, ja ne- !@

HUAHUAH

2005-09-10T04:16:00.000+01:00

yayyy my application for masters is approved.. im so glad thank you Jesus.. uhm im so happy that i can barely stop eating.. i keep on stuffing food in my mouth... its the other way around for some people but heh...would like to thank those who prayed for me too.. i know there are many..and guess what? prayer answered... i feel like saying this kinda thing wont get approved by prayer and fasting.. hehe uhm yayyyyyyyyy... well really had a great night in CF today.. was really great worship lead by eugene .. uhm really glad to see all of the members coming back... aiya dunno what to type.. anyways thank you again Jesus... i k n o w y o u m i s s b u t . . . its asdhnasldjasldjas! thats all ja ne- !!

guess it is over :)

2005-09-06T00:16:00.000+01:00

i t i s o v e r in a sweet way hehe.. anyways would like to thank :

God - for everything especially the ( gosh it is God.. so fast meh.. check check ya ler..)
C heh rylowsuelyn - miss hanging out with you seriously...come back fast
Shuet Ching - i love bleach too and last but not least i love sungai petani.. without it where do all the rice comes?
Leo Lee - even tho u darn fan! but your advice is not 'basi' dont think i dont know ur reading my blog im studying computer.
Lou - u dont read so bleah still ty :D
Eugene - your gonna be healed before you even go for operation.. for His love for you is eternal.. :)
E joo - good advice.. knew u were gonna say that .. but it worked .. i miss you and i know u miss me too..
calvin - hehe you liar back up your files now!!
and like to thank others too for their smile and err food and encouraging word. =)

only 1 day and i miss like crazy

2005-09-03T07:02:00.000+01:00

i dont know how this is going ler diary.. i dont even know where im heading.. guess what? i prayed over it.. and i told God that "i dont wanna continue this anymore.. maybe a non-christian is not a good idea afterall.." but the next day it goes like pooff.. there we meet again bump into each other.. then went jalan jalan buy stuff... spent must of my time in her place this week and guess what? i decided not to call today.. for the whole day because i wanna spend time fellowshipping with friends, but i failed lor.. like what i quote from the topic " i miss like crazy " so i ask God for his peace.. can't continue anymore.. then one question came into my mind.."why cant be friends first ?" hmm true but with this kinda feelings all the time ? dont wanna round out from God's track..

know what i think diary ? dont feel like looking for her anymore..coz im such a selfish bastard..my first lying aim was to tell her about christ.. but nooo I the selfish noodle went unto my own lust.. i need to keep on praying.. ppl that reads my diary pray for me also k ? one by one problems coming.. not that its God's fault but my own...like what ps. desmond said.. building relationship first.. the reason why i include the 'ing' in is because its a on going process..God really need u.. protect me with your wings.. hide me behind your shadow...make my enemy my footstool please..thanks..bye now

stop stop stop it ? or proceed ?

2005-08-31T09:06:00.000+01:00

think i should stop looking for her ? hardness..scared of misunderstanding..ill just chill and see ;)
i need to pray for answers and guidance.. uhm ;)

so happi

2005-08-29T02:21:00.000+01:00

hehe im so happy dunno why.. its just my heart.. praise the Lord.. really am so happy..feel like first time falling in love.. the love that surpasses all human understanding.. the joy the river flowing down under.. yes i am not thirsty anymore..

touched!

2005-08-26T10:25:00.000+01:00

aww man today i really got really touched.. uhm to make the story short today was a praise and prayer night in CF and i got really touched by the presence of the Lord.. really really strong.. felt like spirit top-up.. RELOAD complete hehe.. and i really got touched by one new come err think she came frm china her words really made my spirit top-up so doubled..

owh the third time i got touched was from apple.. she bought me a new slipper and its really really bouncy one.. altho it looked a lil bit like girl slipper but its ok.. aww man i got touched 3 times today.. and Jesus got ressurected right on the third.. what does that mean? during the third day Life has conquered death and therefore..3 times i got touched i receive the top-up Life from Jesus huahua cool innit.. what an interpretation.. all i know is god loves me and last but not least i love him too...

hmm i wonder how is my brethen in m'sia been doing... believe for the best...must be busy eating.. well dont stop eating..if got place in the luggage dont hesitate to bring a lil bit for mua... i miss msian food.. uhm just a short entry... ja na !

no more beer for me giggles

2005-08-22T22:59:00.000+01:00

hello lu ya.. my goodness it is today that i can sit down, on my laptop, and browse through out the internet..its been 1 week since i touch my sweet laptop...huhu it sounds like i fasted computer for a week yay.. okay i dont know what to write, let me dig in..okie la write about london huahu the details about london are as below :

Good London.

central london - because they got alot of stuff to see and funs to have..and we meet many many kinda boring ppl hauhua u'll know why later..
Madamme Tussauds - very very interesting wax museum... serious i got fooled like 3 times and tought those waxo are real.. to be honest, they really look darn real in pictures scares the crap out of me.. ahah took funny funny pics too.. for the price you pay, its worth it!!
the view along london bridge - err i like the side walk, where people do magic and other interesting stuff.. it really made me smile huaha..ohh btw girls there are not bad too :X
beers - well i dont know if its the same, but to be honest londoners have really good taste on beers.. it just gives you the high you never had.. maybe its just me..dont get me wrong, im not an acoholic.. yea right chris ehhh cutting down edi.. need to submit to God :P.. i always lie to myself to get a few drinks..
friends - ahah this is definately true.. i got really cool and caring friends..they kept on asking "are you comfortable?" , " want somemore beers ?" " hungry not? " i feel so touched the Lord has been taking care of mee...
free visits - ahhh not to mention i went in the museums for freeee i dont have to pay coz me fren is working in an advertising screen company which links to many other museums, stadium and etc.. man its just that we got not enough time.. but thank the Lord for his goodness ngek dont really spend much over there tho...

Bad London.

some people - i dont know wether its just me or.. but i think people there are kinda uhm.. self-centered? i dont know they go solo all the time.. seldom i see they go out in a group ? huahua but thats what i heard from my yippie ai yay frens.. that most londonders are erk anti-social huahua..
too big - everyone agrees..even londoners use map how much more people like me ? i hate the tubeeeeeee takes too long time.. switch here and there .. pluss it is very hot... makes my hair ichy.. makes my body itchy too.. thats because i got lotsa fat :P
toilet - we have to pay 20 pence for the toilet.. which is not cool.. i rather pee on the street but people would consider me as an uncivilize cina apek...who always remember to zip their pants
expensive - everything is darn expensive.. i know why.. but i still dont like expensive.. who does? but gah i dont find anything cheap there... to conclude, things are not worth to buy ngek..

thats all about london.. owh and i really enjoyed sunday service..it was GOOD as usuall.. thats because i've not been attending sunday service for the past 3 weeks =X but i praise the Lord for His presence with me.. such a sweet Abba i have..ja na !

london quite fun

2005-08-20T23:39:00.000+01:00

hehe london not bad ah.. had quite a good time ngek.. hehe

hmm my feelings own me.

2005-08-12T21:17:00.000+01:00

aiya its this kinda feeling again... you know whenever you walked pass a couple doing all those "hand holding and caring for each other kinda thing" someone your heart desires the same thing as well...its really hard that sometimes if you really like someone, and that person has another person in mind, its really hard if you know you want to get closer to them, and you try so hard to appoarch and you end up speechless? its really hard sometimes if you really like that very one but knowing that MAYBE she has someone in mind.. it breaks your heart.. so i talked to God to give me courage because my heart is too fragile..my heart falls in love too quickly.. or in other sense like someone too easily haih..so i told God, its pain pain i need your peace.. and somehow if you really fall in love or like that very one.. you would do anything to make her comfortable? its like trow all the sufferings to you instead of her..

seriously Lord only you know me well.. only you who heals me..as you first introduce yourself in the bible "I am the Lord that heals" but sometimes pain pain..sometimes we do it so well that it doesnt look like pain pain ? how to avoid it? when i cant even control my own feelings? it just arise.. i cant force myself not to participate? it just jumps right in tru you then you have to call out for our saviour.. is it true that if we fall in love or like that very one we have to sacrife for someone she liked? in the other party its so unfair.. but to answer every question, save the best for what God had saved for you... that is what we call salvation :P i think i gone too much of this heart breaking thing.. i dont want my heart to get used to it or else i wont be able to love again.. i always tell myself dont go there chris else mr pain pain would come again.. but hey how leh it just goes like that.. haih lets submit to the captain and commander of our life..

we are gonna miss u j00 joo..

2005-08-07T20:19:00.000+01:00

this post is especially for ejoo the small... uhm this little girl is such a sweetheart.. thats a combination of sweet+heart, which makes her a sweet person with a loving heart.. altho sometimes it can be the other way around but, but chances are less when she turns into a lil devil.. i meet her for around a year and half and she & christine is one of the first to bring me to church.. i still remember EVER sunday, without fail, joo makes sure that i hit church..even tho i dont have time to take my bath.. that proves that i seldom take my bath in the morning.. aiya i dont know what to write anymore..but this girl really a cheerful one..never see her face frown before.. NEVER wei.. always smiling.. marvel and thinks how great is He who lives in us ;) enough said.. ejoo you rock.. and yea i miss sami too.. u rock too girl.. haih everyone is leaving.. i think i need huimin's immune system on this huahua.. anyways i decided to post some pics of joo chua ee ;)

beauty & the beast ..

me and ejoo.

waa jia lat man apesal takle post picture ??? maximum 2 onli grrr macam taik...toddles!!

the legendary sabaku no gaara

2005-08-03T01:16:00.000+01:00

Gaara, the name that when pronounced causes people to freeze for an instant. Freeze because the name Gaara itself has become a synonym for death. Ever since his first appearance Gaara has inspired fear, seemingly being an emotionless killer, a monster. Gaara only talks when it's time to threaten someone or while having a thought about the person whom he is in battle with. Most of the time only the desire to kill and a deep hatred for everything that breathes consumes his every thought.

Like Naruto, Gaara also hides a terrible secret. He has sealed within his body one of the Jinchuuriki, a tailed demon. Deep within his body Shukaku awaits the moment when he'll wake up from his sleep, when the body of that who carries him falls alseep. Gaara's past is indeed the most tragic and awful of anyone in the series, from the moment he was born Gaara was deeply hated. His own Mother who gave birth to him even hated him for the fact that she was made a sacrifice for him, she would die cursing at him. The name Gaara itself is telling of his personality trait as it means "A demon who only loves himself". The name was chosen for him by his Mother who wished and believed he was only to fight for his sake and love only himself, and by doing so he would live on forever. This gesture was not done out of love for Gaara but rather in hopes that Gaara would live on to carry her grudge that everyone would come to acknowledge.

As a child things only got worse for Gaara. Always alone no child would dare play with him, every time he tried with the nicest smile that his tortured soul could possibly show everyone would run off screaming, screaming in fear as they believed him to be a moster that would kill them. This was only fuelled several times when out of a panicked self defense his sand barrier nearly killed a few of the children, which was no fault of Gaara. The only friend Gaara was able to find was in Yashamaru, the only person who really tried to love Gaara, the only one to calm him when he was sad, and give him advice when he could. This all changed when one night sitting alone, trying to understand the purpose in life, he was attacked by a single ninja. This was a foolish thing for the attacker to do as Gaara had no problem defending himself with a deadly attack that crushed the masked opponent. When Gaara unmasked the assailant he discovered that it was none other than the person who he considered a friend, Yashamaru! Yashamaru explained that he had received an order from Gaara's father, the Kazekage of the Hidden Sand Village, to kill Gaara. Absolutely terrified, backed into his last bit of sanity Gaara stated that Yashamaru was forced to attack him.

Yashamaru would only destroy this hypothesis by telling Gaara that this was only a last refuge, he could have refused the order but deep down he has always resented Gaara. He continued on saying Gaara had never been loved by anyone, not his Father, not his Mother, he was only an experiment made by the village to try and take control over the awesome power of the one tailed demon inside of Gaara, but he was a failure, and therefore the failure had to be killed. Even on the brink of death Yashamaru tried once more to kill Gaara, blowing himself up, but not killing Gaara. Following this Gaara began to believe that the only reason to live was to love himself and annihilate all who lived.

my muscle hurts!

2005-07-28T20:28:00.000+01:00

im falling in love to Him all over again.. lets talk a lil bit about Him.. btw people who doesnt know whois Him thinks im gay, worldy picture :P Jesus Jesus Jesus.. with him everything was made and WITHOUT, NOTHING was made how amazing.. all the mountains, birds, air and the most & not least uniquely made was Mankind..and talking about the wildest creature on earth is considered to be Humans? coz they cost everything to fall, not only that, death,diseases and femine is brought by human a.k.a ah tam(hokkien name) adam (english) to say it in human terms they bring hell up on earth as it is in hell :P my nonsense.. i was just talking to some people and suddenly my heart fall in love with Jesus again.. you know the first love with your partner but this love its different its called the agape love...

last time i tought religion is all about "DO GOOD GET GOOD, DO BAD GET BEAT" thats the point of view i get from muslim.. the stoning session when a convert tries to flee from muslim to another religion? got the idea? and i always tought that muslim is something similar to christianity, but i thank the Lord noo.. its all about His grace, his Love, mercy..no wonder He said if you see me you see Life, the Light brought down to remove darkness..aww man Jesus is so cool..and before i was a new christian, i never understand grace...i ever questioned myself askin "man if christian is do good get good and do bad get beat then why did Jesus alllowed the thief to be in paradise with Him? understand grace in order to understand that story..the divine love of our Lord Jesus...His like shouting to those people who are legalistic "ITS NOT ABOUT YOUR WORKS U CANNOT EARN YOUR WAY UP TO HEAVEN!!! BUT ITS ALL ABOUT ME!! YOUR WORKS ARE NOT STRONGER THAN MY Grace!!" awesome God..well to be honest if its all about our work, then Jesus could ask the theif to do GOOD FIRST!! then the thief will ask Him back "HOW Lord i would love too but im stuck at the cross!!" sometimes we just have to think...

the new covenant is all about grace.. its not our picture, but the picture of Jesus christ..hehe funny when people consider the gospels of math,luke,mark & john as i.e. gospel of john.. its the gospel of Jesus christ!! only one Gospel (singular) and apostle paul really wrote it clearly in Roms 1:16 For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ, for it is the power of God unto salvation to everyone who believes, .." ahh so glad that im still learning untill the kingdom comes.. my muscle hurts gah! long time neber exercise! well thats all diary, toddles!

tuesday day of day

2005-07-26T23:29:00.000+01:00

what a fool i dont know bout tomorrow what its like to bee.. gosh im really tired swam like one half hours and still for others it is too short lol..i am feeling bored+tired now.. i really miss smiling while walking and i do it real good today i mean the peace of God which surpasses all human understanding is guarding my heart..i use to call all those people whois praising God on the street as crazy+mad+stupid+taktahumalu+c2pid..now i know why people could sing out loud praising good..and these people are those who have really close intemacy with God well most of em..not saying myself la but THOSE.. i smell like a pool now i dont know why..did took my bath but the smell is still there and yes i did take my bath properly..

know what i really want a digital camera right now.. need to record down my life and sometimes as memories, i can just view it again and start thinking how stupid am i before.. suddenly my mood change crappy me... and i was just wondering how on earth AM i gonna get married..im soo soo ahh out of expectation in other words, lame..fully agree that i am t0 the max weak in the sense of a responsible person and character wise..just imagine that i have nothing man, not even a standard..im gonna be straight forward now really like those straight forward type.. what am i talking..God i just pray for open doors for the course im applying in and Lord i dont wanna be like thoese israelites going round and round the 'thang' for years if its not of your will send me back home.. im prepared. i got your picture, but i need a louder voice..like a horn from you so i can trigger your call.. just a loud shout God..thank you for your amazing grace these days and thank you for showing me whats life is all about..in Jesus name i pray and ask AMEN..

FULL MOON SWEARS!

2005-07-07T15:17:00.000+01:00

i am so angry!!! im so pist off? i dont know what kinda feeling is this i mean im gonna blow man... and the inner me is saying "FUCKKKKKKK JUST LET IT GOOOOO LET IT BURST!!" i got so many shit to handle... crap man my pants its gonna drop anytime!!! yes u call it 'foo lat' in cantonese..man im so mad at Adam now you know why? cos he cost all this to happened i bet when we all go up to heaven alot of people is gonna look for Adam.. and guess what ? his mansion is gonna be HEAVENLY SECURED! alot angels around..why?? coz ill be the first one to find his blooming ass beat the shit out of him coz he ate the fucking fruit.... i cannot tahan man so many problemssssss and i dont fucking believe its from God..coz this is a fallen earth and sometimes shit happends because of our own fault..soo i did personally ask myself.. God is this from you..

ahh i was brought to a verse James 1:12-15-17 Jam 1:12 Blessed is the man who endures temptation, because having been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. Jam 1:13 Let no one being tempted say, I am tempted from God. For God is not tempted by evils, and He tempts no one. Jam 1:14 But each one is tempted by his lusts, being drawn away and seduced by them. Jam 1:15 Then when lust has conceived, it brings forth sin. And sin, when it is fully formed, brings forth death. Jam 1:16 Do not err, my beloved brothers. Jam 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness nor shadow of turning.

uhuh so true...man shit crap la i donno what to do...just trust in the Lord of host.. the captain and commander of the ship the one who said "it is done!!!"...patient man well anyways writing this just to let go of every smelly shit crap in me.. Lord i thank you for the cross, that everyyy SINS are punished and every dieases are healed.. thanks just that argh its ME!! your peace will guard my heart yes it will :)

big news!

2005-07-05T11:00:00.000+01:00

finally vincent's a daddy and man im so proud of him!!!!!!!! man im even more proud than him..on wednesday we shall visit that lil dude..owh thank God for the smooth process of labouring.. adonai...well everything seems to be running well just that cynthia is a little bit weak right now.. well dohh ppl just gave birth weii..man i dont know this feeling la sooo darn excited and thankful LIKE that kid is mineeeee...wahh i cannot imagine man holding my future wife's hand saying "pushh pushh" now dont blame me thats what they do in ER learned it from the show..man this week been really ugh how to say 'kanasai' aiya i dont know la i've not been feeding the word of God thats why..owh talking about that, ahh forget it.

aiyooooooooo tomorrow got alot things to do man!!! have to fetch people from airport, have to go check out the new house my goodness, man i have to climb back up to the Lord again.. really i cannot have peace with out the peace of God lor..man this week i even think of not being a christian anymore? you see!!! the devil is telling me.. alot of nonsense like "your not good enough, of course people can say it so easy because they dont have the same shit you used to have etc etc" then ill shoot back of course im not good enough but Jesus is good enough and i receive not from you but His grace.. man mr sa tan dont really changes his script do he..his still the same hauhuah...and man i have this feeling that some of my friends is falling on my xfriends side..love chris love grrr knock knock! whos there man! mr devil hehe my tots these few days really grrr 'kanasai' well need to climb back up to His lap...man im so glad that we have so many things to learn un!!!

man this is so good!!!

2005-07-03T21:16:00.000+01:00

this is something that caught my eye and its sooo true.. bring back old memories ngek!

When you are together with that special someone, you pretend to ignore that person. But when that special someone is not around, you might look around to find them.At that moment, you are in love.

Although there is someone else who always makes you laugh,your eyes and attention might go only to that special someone.Then, you are in love.

Although that special someone was supposed to have called you long back, to let you know of their safe arrival,your phone is quiet. You are desperately waiting for the call!At that moment, you are in love.

If you are much more excited for one short e-mail fromthat special someone than other many long e-mails,you are in love.

When you find yourself as one who cannot erase all themessages in your answering machine because of one messagefrom that special someone, you are in love.

When you get a couple of free movie tickets, you wouldnot hesitate to think of that special someone.Then, you are in love. and it goes onn and on again... ahhh!

flytothesky - missing you.

2005-06-29T20:28:00.000+01:00

hin jen ka tega ani na go redo anmin myo na ka hija sayeo...hamja na sarang na rago..tonight is just one night narul ee ko jo sorng'....hambon man ne ma ju gorooo everyday everynight i am missing you..negah de nap sayeo onje ya ne mane na op sayao...narul eejjo rong jo oroo..hamb onto kede ja risooooo everyday everynight i am missing youuuuuuuu.......yeahh yeahh yeahh..

we ja ko nami ape go chi..hapa ha nayeoo son na yeo..weh abu ma aji hanayeoooo..chi ge min de hapa hanende babo kachoo hansang ku decho kude ye he cho ku de wee heso..na ja ni kam sa heyeo...no mu no mul saranghae jimah..shiiii ge min deeeeeeeee kude apende na ye mane muuu...ore shiga kude ni anaa..babokacoo kude ya hejooo kudewee hesoooo..saranghae yo na ji na kamsah heyeoooo...hije soyaa hapa nande sarang hae yoo hamja ni hamsaa heyeoooo...gooo joooooooooo.... ahhhhhhhh.

ni ja sarang araso? ne ne- arang ja na nomu ji ma shiet ge ka? un- ne we sarang na hamnida' ^0^
ne- kude ja anyeong ham sa ni da :D...ahhh shival zot karaa.. byun shin..

Welcome to my life

Read the title

God Is Your Rewarder

Are you offering a job ?

Men Whom Men Condemn as I'll

A story like mine has never been told.

summary

sucky day indeed.

The Spirit and your Flesh.

God is a matchmaker

lover of my soul~

just saying things out.

read this :)

Those who has ear let him hear. it's from my heart.

The love of God

my life is like a path.

The head and one body are one.

big smash on the face.

;)

fire

.

pain

shalom

yep.

Questions.

in spirit and in truth.

hahah yay

awaken!

Nothing Wrong With God, His Word And You

CF tonite

a big -___________-"

some sharing.

lalala ~ lalaland

Neec

complaint

sien.

interesting, the Love of God.

Faith.

thinking of u brian..

shame on me!

i got rabbit hehe cute one!

lalala my bday is gud.

The Holy Spirit.

yawn

Glory to thee.

ohio!

dear journal

wah lao

lalala

a whole new world.

tail -f /var/log/messages | presentation tomorrow.

IT IS FINISHED *TETTELESTAI*

updates.

sleep well, litte child the Lord holds thee new

pix post

laugh of the day

whos the loser? *hands up*

like that lor..

aww!

jialat la

my dream.

talk to the hand!

yawn

today.

hehe.. tipsy.

in the lab

why do this kinda stories stick on me? -.-"

uhh sigh

sien la..

sigh

story of a mum.

roarr angry ppl around.

huhu..

uhh!

mmmm miss u guys/gals.

i am a new creation.

core dump.

ja ne-

-_-"

testing me new cam -.-"

IT IS FINISHED TETTELESTAI

whos the loser? hands up

no more beer for me giggles